Follow Friday – Presents

31 Dec

When my family arrived for Christmas morning brunch, we immediately locked Jupiter in the bedroom. He doesn’t behave in the best of times, so we weren’t taking any chances. What we weren’t expecting, however, was Zorro to dart in between the presents and tear off bits of wrapping paper and bows. And the ribbon on Isobel’s gift drove him crazy.

Right now Isobel is sitting on my lap as I type, intermittently shouting out, “Isobel! Presents! Santa!” Good times. I saved all the leftover wrapping paper this year (it always seems like such a waste) and I’m using it as packing materials for my Etsy shop. In fact, I have two packages on my desk waiting to go out, and their fragile contents are swaddled in wrapping paper.  If you order anything from me in the next month or so, expect to find some leftover Christmas cheer in your box.

What is Follow Friday? It’s a Twitter meme that I have taken a couple steps further.  See my nomination for a Shorty Award for Follow Friday here. You can read more Follow Friday goodness here. Learn more about it in my FAQ.

FakeeEtiquette It is always rude to copy that floppy.

theRratedBull Playing “The Game of Life” loses its luster when you’re an adult and play the game of life everyday.

lafix When people ask if they can get me anything, I always ask for a jetpack.

simontarr Pretty sure my father in law buys a new printer when his ink cartridges run out. He might actually be a genius.

ApocalypseHow Aqualunch #6thGradeClassicRock

ApocalypseHow “I Want to Know What Like Is” #6thGradeClassicRock

ApocalypseHow Enter Sandbox #6thGradeClassicRock

ApocalypseHow Blinded By The Masturbation #6thGradeClassicRock

schmutzie I’m still sitting here and eating chocolates. I think I’ll do this until mid-January at least.

louispeitzman NYE is the FML of holidays.

AnimalBullshit Pandas are gold-digging whores.

simontarr To be clear: by “libertard” I mean “libertarian ‘tard”. Different than “libtard” (liberal ‘tard). Or just “tard.” Which is “conservative.”

wawap There’s a terrible Facebook virus going around. It’s causing people to post old news stories as well as misinformation. Oh, wait…

thejohnblog Diamonds and perfectly timed declarations of “Yo Mama” are forever.

Greeblemonkey My 8yo has started saying “oh-em-gee” on a regular basis. So, yeah, he’s now officially the world’s youngest douchebag.

palinode My mother was a force of nurture.

eshep If you are interested in taking in some southern folk-art phallus murals, look no further than the Marian (NC) Truck Plaza men’s room.

phaemarie My nerdy teenager keeps herp-derping at me.

RailbirdJ Just called a guy abt business. I think he answered in a bathroom. On speaker. This is why I email.

ScrewyDecimal I didn’t have a commute this morning. I had an odyssey. It was the stuff of epic poems. I am Dante, and Brooklyn is the 9th circle of Hell.

shinyinfo I think I know this dude but I can’t tell. All ginger hipster dudes with beards look alike. #HipsterRacism

ordermeanother Merry Christmas, Bitches!

BadAstronomer All I Want for Christmas is Your Two Front Teeth #MerryZombiemas

BadAstronomer Have Yourself a Mary Little Christmas #MerryZombiemas

BadAstronomer Santa Claus is Shambling to Town #MerryZombiemas

BadAstronomer Little Drumstick Boy #MerryZombiemas

shinyinfo I got wished “Merry Christmas” by more Muslims than Christians this year. The “War on Christmas” is complete bullshit. #HappyHolidays

realMickFoley I wonder how many wrestling fans think of me when Marley says “Mankind was my business.”

The_Pigeon When making your resolutions, don’t forget to leave room for “letting the Pigeon drive the bus”.

CaffeinatedLiby I just found my cell phone in my bra drawer. I think that means it is time for bed.

MrWordsWorth All of Lifetime’s movies seem to have the same message of empowerment, if you consider ‘ladies, your lives are in danger’ empowerment.

guiltysquid Found some stuff of the ex’s in a closet that I’m pretty sure he’d want. Hope he’s up for some dumpster diving.

LaurelKS John just shot out of bed to be with his TV. Amused but concerned.

thejohnblog Let he who spelled chihuahua correctly the first time without Google cast the first stone.

buildingjason I am pregnant with the love-child of queso and shame.

almightygod Happy birthday Jesus. Sorry I wasn’t around when you were growing up.

sween All I wanted for Christmas was peace on Earth. But they were right. Just shot my eye out.


JerryThomas If the name of your favorite band has a punctuation mark in it, you might be a hipster. #sophisticatedfoxworthy

louispeitzman The coolest thing I did in high school was making a LiveJournal icon of Garfield reading the newspaper with lyrics from “A Day in the Life.”

Sigafoos No matter how appropriate, Elizabeth did not approve of my usage of the phrase ‘Present Orgy’ today.

Phineas It’s almost 1 pm and I don’t even care that I haven’t opened a present yet. Being an adult is bullshit.

smileydooby Its like I tell my 4 year old. If you don’t have anything nice to say, get a twitter account.

jen_talley 4 yo nephew comes in with giant Toy Story doll. “I GOT A WOODY!!”

jesus Overslept. Was in a cage match with Santa the entire evening.

ApocalypseHow Tucker Carlson says Michael Vick should be executed – specifically, “hung from a bowtie until dead.”

Sigafoos Oh, forgot to announce yesterday that I’m giving up my dream of brewing in lieu of artisanal Ethernet cable making.

juliussharpe Another Xmas of going home and telling my older relatives I invented Twitter. It’s just easier they think that.

badbanana Holiday vacation. I have reached a level of inactivity normally associated with a Kardashian library card.

inversejaik 3rd cousin’s pension now being discussed in great detail. #ohgrandma

colsonwhitehead Haters gonna hate. Butters gonna butt.


What is Follow Friday? It’s a Twitter meme that I have taken a couple steps further.  See my nomination for a Shorty Award for Follow Friday here. You can read more Follow Friday goodness here. Learn more about it in my FAQ.

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