Follow Friday – Garden Gnome Edition

14 Jan

Today caps off an inordinately stressful week at work. The kind of stressful that makes me frustrated to the bone, because it is so very unnecessary. It’s a pointless kind of stress, the one I’m sure every one with coworkers has often experienced.   Aside from that, Isobel’s been delving deeper into girl territory and leaving baby territory, bit by bit. Since we got an Xbox for Christmas, Anthony and I are eager to play Prince of Persia, probably my favorite game ever, but we’re going to wait until his training is over. Today’s edition of Follow Friday is filled with photos from late November and early December, when we could still go outside, and before the weather turned cold in earnest.

What is Follow Friday? It’s a Twitter meme that I have taken a couple steps further.  See my nomination for a Shorty Award for Follow Friday here. You can read more Follow Friday goodness here. Learn more about it in my FAQ.

theRratedBull We should have named The Baby “H.R. Poops-n-pants.”

SarahIvy It’s not even a real word, but I’m embarrassed that I spelled ‘Snowpocalypse’ wrong.

MrsFreestyle $45 bought me one bag of groceries at whole foods. I need to start prostituting.

TheRedQueen Fairly certain a goose gang turf war is happening at the park.

inversejaik Thunderpussy #Bond23Titles

inversejaik Octo-balls #Bond23Titles

lauracope just heard myself calmly tell him that name-calling “doesn’t strengthen our relationship.” god, I’m such a boring adult now

BridgetCallahan My favorite part of today has been realizing I didn’t put my car in the garage last night, and then giving it a mohawk.

telephase Align all the text in your resume so it forms crop circles. Or a pentagram. This will demonstrate creativity.

DadsAwake New research indicates that use of opiates can lead to impotence. Poppy cock.

MrWordsWorth Hear me out: The Jay-Z Shore. Jay-Z. Shirtless. Wearing a bump-it. Yeah, I need to think these things through.

NASeason How am I supposed to sing lullabies to my kid when the only songs I know the words to are “Ice, Ice, Baby” and “Baby Got Back”?

Brain_Wash What I lack in slim, I make up for in shady.

mrteacup My lifecoach says that at birth, his god Crom gives us courage to survive & defeat our adversaries in battle

danforthfrance I’m much better at dealing with depression during the hours thrift stores are open.

BridgetCallahan Tonight we’re going to find out what happens when you fall asleep to My Sharona on repeat.

willgoldstein Finished reading Leviticus, and now know the punishment for sleeping with my female slaves. Not death. Phew!

matthewbaldwin Great editors will sometimes delete everything you have written and make you start over. In that sense, Microsoft Word is a great editor.

davetotheross Diet Coke is like the opposite of sports.

Malecopywriter My favorite part about Detroit? The heavy “Armageddon is tomorrow” pours by every bartender in town.

helgagrace The acronym for this school’s program is MEEEP, which is the sound my ancient Mac used to make at me when I did something wrong.

MrWordsWorth Watching Man V. Food. Adam ‘hit the wall.’ It’ is like the moment in Behind the Music when a band member starts drinking or sexing a goat.

iasshole Aw, someone corrected my spelling when they retweeted me. Nicely done.

jenniferweiner Learn to pronounce author’s name in advance. Do not start event with, “Please welcome Jennifer…um…is it Weener?” #itisnot

FrankConniff I don’t think there’s ever been a time in my life when I’ve felt Country Strong.

apelad Happy 1111111111!1

tristina_wright Just got an email from babycenter titled, “Why you still look pregnant” ummmmm….delete. #mutters #shakesfist

The_Pigeon Just had my Grit tested. It’s 43% True. Frankly, that’s better than I’d expected.

FakeAPStylebook The plural of “Prius” is “Puppies.” (@Toyota, we accept PayPal.)

Sigafoos (PS, @exlibris, I hope you’re okay with being a Motherfucker for Hire)

shellipants I think (maybe) I’ll get dressed right now (into clean jammies)

love_drunk This employee karaoke thing has yet to disappoint. Someone’s soulfully, albeit quietly, closing it out with Feel Like Makin’ Love.

antigone_spit I hate when I ask someone something like oh what kind of car did they get and they’re like a pregnant rollerskate

adiopink I propose another spin-off of Law & Order. SVA: Subject-Verb Agreement, the Grammar Police.

danforthfrance Had a one night stand and now I’ve got the Yahoo! Toolbar.

malenkayaptitsa Last night I had a dream that my aunt was sitting on my bed talking to me. Then I woke up and it was just my giant cat smush-snuggling me.

mikey_m00n I feel like a number. A number two actually.

jszyd I played ice hockey for nearly 3 hours yesterday. I’m pretty sure that makes me at least partially Canadian.

peterbyrnes Next time I plan to make love to my lady on a bed of roses, I need to remember: petals ONLY.

louispeitzman The full title of Britney’s new single is “Hold It Against Me (I Mean Your Penis, LOL).”

mrpilkington First person through the door: crazy homeless person. This day already has pizazz.

MeganBoley It pleases me that people are searching for “cat eggs” and coming to my blog.

libscenester At penn station, quietly judging, and being judged.

VHStapes2 Save your morning poop for work so you get paid for that shit!

kaonicks (insert sex joke here, then take it out and put it in and take it out and put it in.)

dawnhfoster I legally have to wear a beret today as I’m going to an art gallery.

markleggett When I was a kid I only ever had the yellow lion from Voltron. I had a lot of fun turning it into a left leg.

markleggett Dear fathers who don’t pull the power cord out of the console when their son is about to beat them at video games. I applaud your strength.

shinyinfo When you find yourself on a movie with Ashton Kutcher, you know you’ve made a bad decision. #LifeLessons

ThatKansasLady Never underestimate a woman who can hook her bra with one hand and fry bacon with the other.

fierceflawless My memory foam mattress is frozen solid again. It’s cold in Atlanta.

markleggett My bum has fallen asleep. It’s having that dream again.

What is Follow Friday? It’s a Twitter meme that I have taken a couple steps further.  See my nomination for a Shorty Award for Follow Friday here. You can read more Follow Friday goodness here. Learn more about it in my FAQ.

6 Responses to “Follow Friday – Garden Gnome Edition”

  1. Sunday January 14, 2011 at 10:55 am #

    This is somewhat unrelated but just reminded me that you might be the person to talk to – we’ve been looking for a garden gnome for our actual garden for WEEKS now. Months, actually, and can’t find one! The only decent-quality ones are literally the “Travelocity Gnome”-branded gnomes, and they’re like $30, which makes me sad.

    So basically: if you ever see a garden gnome in a thrift shop, I will happily and promptly pay you for it.

    • LittleBig January 16, 2011 at 2:49 pm #

      I’m your man! Er, woman. Er, gnome.

      Are you looking for inside gnome or outside gnome? I found an inside-only gnome recently, but it could be a dock-worker. Or a fisherman. Anyway, it’s playing the concertina and Isobel keeps calling it “baby.”

      • Sunday January 24, 2011 at 11:56 am #

        Oh, outside gnome for sure. No, I really want to have the kind of old lady garden that has tons of Scandinavian-themed yard ornaments clustered around her illegal cluster of opium poppies.

      • LittleBig January 24, 2011 at 4:26 pm #

        I’ll look for tomte then, too. You’ll also need a sign that says PARKING FOR SWEDES ONLY and at least one sign that says UFF DA!

  2. Windsor Grace January 14, 2011 at 11:34 am #

    This is a really good one. Nice choices 🙂

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