Amusing Thrift Store Finds

2 Jun

This last Mother’s Day was pretty crappy. It’s only my third one so far, and I can’t even remember what I did last year. I’m sure it was fun whatever it was, but not as fun as my first Mother’s Day when Anthony took me to a local lavender farm for a picnic. Isobel slept and ate and relaxed comfortably in her sling while we wandered row upon row of fragrant flowers. It was wonderful. Compare that to this year when I locked us out of our car and Isobel threw an epic tantrum in a restaurant, and the winner is obvious. More lavender, please!

Not that this Mother’s Day was a wash. I was still pretty sick, but we did manage to go by a thrift store and take Isobel to a park. Both good things. Later on, I napped. Bliss.

Look at that smile! This was pre-restaurant meltdown. You’d never know it, but an hour later she erupted like Mount Vesuvius. If Mount Vesuvius was two and a half feet tall and wearing diapers.

We had no idea what we were in for.

But before the meltdowns and car drama we went thrifting, and if you notice the Little Big Thrifting Pyramid at the top of this post, you’ll know my eventual point is to show you some Amusing Thrift Store Finds. Go here, here, and here for previous finds.

First up are two silvery pieces of fruit. They look like paperweights. Just try giving this “What A Pear!” paperweight to your boss or coworker and see how quickly the sexual harassment suits roll in.

This kitten statue is not only disturbing, but it looks like it came straight out of  “Kittens! Inspired by Kittens!”

This piggy bank is just for our friend Stef, who packed up her cats, her piano, and her bearded husband and moved out of state to teach at the University of Reno while enrolled in their PhD program. Reno is kind of a sad little (big) town, so this I HEART RENO piggy bank is weirdly depressing. Save your coins so you can gamble away your savings at the CVS slot machines!

Stefanie, this is how I feel when I look at you. You’re welcome.

Next we have “Country Deodorant.”

No comment.

I can’t imagine any positive use for an I HEART COWS wagon.

Of course Isobel found the Furby. OF COURSE SHE DID. Nevermind that it was located in with the dishes and candles. She would zero in on the demonic furry creature amongst all the harmless candles and plates and knickknacks. The worst part about the Furby is that once she touched it, it started talking in Furbish to her. Which mesmerized her in a way that books about alien abduction fascinated me as a child. Unhealthily.

What’s worse is that after she set the Furby down and move on to something else, it would wait about a minute or so before that Furbish voice would say something, thereby causing her to abandon her new interest and securing her attention, starting the Loop of Demonic Fascination all over again. Just when we thought we were free, its Furbish voice called us back again.

If you come across a Furby while thrifting, don’t touch it, don’t look it in the eye, and definitely do not say its name three times in a darkened room.

TMI, DUDE.

Advertisements

15 Responses to “Amusing Thrift Store Finds”

  1. emily bilbrey June 2, 2011 at 11:36 am #

    i love EVERYTHING about this post.

    ya hear me??!

    EVERYTHING.

    • LittleBig June 2, 2011 at 1:08 pm #

      I can’t tell you what that means to me. 🙂

  2. Tristina June 2, 2011 at 2:48 pm #

    Lavender Farm!! What an amazing thing to do!

    And I love love love everything you found and want to go thrifting with you someday.

    For reals.

  3. lilpyrogirl June 2, 2011 at 4:40 pm #

    Are you going to follow the government’s lead and revise your “thrifting pyramid” to a “thrifting plate?”

  4. Stella June 2, 2011 at 7:43 pm #

    I went thrifting today! Only had time to stop at one place, but I found a bunch of Candlewick that I had to buy, despite not needing it AT ALL. My kitchen cabinets are groaning with glassware as it is….

  5. Anne June 3, 2011 at 7:56 am #

    Ooh, I want to go to a lavender farm!! That looks awesome. Also I love that hat.

    This post really makes me long for my college days working at the local Goodwill. I found so much awesome stuff back then. *wistful*

  6. sarah June 3, 2011 at 12:53 pm #

    Dan wants that mug, BAD. Where did you find it?

    • LittleBig June 3, 2011 at 12:59 pm #

      At a thrift store waaaaay the fuck out on McHenry. It was a Hope Chest. They have lots of locations, but this one was way out past most of the car dealerships, if you know where I mean.

      Either that or it was at one on East Ave in Turlock. Because I went to two places that day. But I’m almost positive it was at the McHenry one.

    • LittleBig June 3, 2011 at 1:00 pm #

      I might hit up the East Ave one tomorrow. If so I’ll buy it if I see it.

  7. sarah June 3, 2011 at 1:03 pm #

    IF it’s still there

    We may have to hit up the Hope Chest today…

    • LittleBig June 3, 2011 at 1:16 pm #

      GODSPEED.

      I doubt people were lining up for that mug.

      You guys were super fun to thrift with. (Dan especially. Remember all those weird albums he bought?)

  8. sarah June 3, 2011 at 1:23 pm #

    Ha Ha, you too! And no, I don’t remember because Dan buying weird albums is a pretty regular occurrence!

    • LittleBig June 3, 2011 at 1:26 pm #

      The dude with the piano. And all the poppies.

      He bought like all six copies they had.

  9. sarah June 3, 2011 at 1:33 pm #

    He has multiples of several records. I think his 65 copies of Herb Alpert’s “Whipped Cream and Other Delights” take the cake.

Leave a Reply to Anne Cancel reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: