Thrift Store Score: The Golden Ass

29 Aug

I thought I was dreaming when I saw it. I honestly don’t know whether to categorize this as Thrift Store Score or Thrift Store Gore. It’s so perfect. I almost didn’t buy it, but then I realized that if I didn’t I would regret it for the rest of my entire life.

After finally deciding it had to be mine, I tweeted “Going to see a man about a Golden Ass.” Your eyes do not deceive you. It’s a blank donkey trophy.

My neighbors across the street were having a giant yard sale with a couple other families they knew, and naturally, I had to check it out. One of the families there was selling a bunch of these trophies. By the time I went back for this one, all the others were gone. A sellout item at every yard sale, they said. I can see why! It has so much potential. Think of all the things you could get engraved on it.

I sure would be flattered to receive a trophy like this on Valentine’s day!

Or, you could give it to a coworker.

Hell, I’d like a bunch of those so I could just hand them out to people on the street.

Yes, a blank donkey trophy is pretty much the best greeting card ever.


15 Responses to “Thrift Store Score: The Golden Ass”

  1. JuJuBee August 29, 2011 at 5:42 am #

    Pretty awesome score. Did you get any back story on WHY they had it in the first place?

    • LittleBig August 29, 2011 at 7:43 am #

      She said she got a bunch at work…?

      • JuJuBee August 29, 2011 at 2:23 pm #

        Hmmmmmm……… sounds like she has an interesting job?

      • Missy (@geceosan) August 29, 2011 at 7:16 pm #

        there are multiple golden ass awards for multiple reasons?! wha…? i can’t even…

      • LittleBig August 30, 2011 at 3:11 pm #

        But they are so versatile!

  2. K August 29, 2011 at 7:23 am #

    “Congratulations. You’re an ass.” is making me snort laugh. So awesome.

    • LittleBig August 29, 2011 at 7:43 am #

      I’m sure you can think of a few people who deserve these.

  3. Windsor Grace August 29, 2011 at 7:42 am #

    I want a blank golden ass

  4. TheBlackStar (@TheBlackStar) August 29, 2011 at 9:11 am #

    I would like to have a few cases of congratulations your an ass ones. I would keep a case in my passenger seat at all times, so I can deliver them to assbag drivers via a nice toss on the freeway.

  5. stella September 1, 2011 at 2:21 am #

    Please tell me you bought one.

  6. stella September 1, 2011 at 2:22 am #

    Oh never mind. I cannot read apparently.

    • LittleBig September 2, 2011 at 2:12 pm #

      LOL, we are on the same page when it comes to blank donkey trophies, I see.

  7. Shelby September 4, 2011 at 8:32 am #

    I feel like a 13 year old boy but I love the “Congratulations, You’re An Ass” one. Can I give it to my boss? 🙂

  8. Gutmeister September 4, 2011 at 7:41 pm #

    I wish I had a few Ass trophies. Not because I want to be witty and snarky and hand them out to people I feel deserve them, but because I need a hobby. Ass trophy collecting is going to be the next Pokemon phenomenon

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