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Follow Friday – The D Cup

10 Jun

See that bit of nature up there? It is the reason why the D cup isn’t with us today. Well, that and a certain 25lb cat.

I found the D cup while thrifting. It was so gorgeous–a delicate glass cup monogrammed with an Old English-style “D” in gold, wreathed by laurel leaves. I was going to sell it in my shop, but first I was going to fill it with flowers and nature and take some photographs. My mistake was leaving it unattended. I keep forgetting that Zorro will do anything to DESTROY DESTROY DESTROY the natures. In an effort to eat the leaves and berries I put in the vase, he knocked it off a shelf and destroyed it. Boo.

What is Follow Friday? It’s a Twitter meme that I have taken a couple steps further.  See my nomination for a Shorty Award for Follow Friday here. You can read more Follow Friday goodness here. Learn more about it in my FAQ.

Zaius13 Area man gets gist of Onion article after first paragraph, stops reading.

RestlessLori Today I will honor the shaving of my pits by wearing a maxi dress. #youarewelcome

TheSuniverse Since it’s so hot, I’m thinking I’ll put bags of frozen peas in my clothes. I’ll cool off AND make a side dish!

charlesthomas “And then Abraham Lincoln freed the slaves using his heat vision, because George Washington died for your sins.” #PalinHistory

SadnessRUs Life is very long. Very very very very very very very long. Really long. So. Long. And for most of it, you’ll be very tired.

danforthfrance I just took a stab at the name of the new X-Men movie and came up with “X…Class?” Hello. I am your dad now.

MrWordsWorth Josh Duhamel will return to All My Children. After you’ve been in a Michael Bay film, that’s a step up.

thejohnblog When computers become self aware, you can spot the douchebags easily. They’ll be the ones wearing their CAPTCHA sideways.

adam_fogle Beyonce could sing the phone book and I’d still think it was amazing that they continue to make phone books.

TheBlackStar @exlibris I played countless hours of [Kid Icarus] myself, and who knows how many of those as an eggplant.

FlyteAphrodite “Live in the moment”?! That advice sucks. You live in my shitty moment. I’m going to live in my fantasy future where everything goes right.

LouisPeitzman Just read a comment that said, “Society today has gone crazy.” I think that’s YouTube for, “Everything since the Dark Ages upsets me.”

thomashawk I sure hope what happened to Anthony Weiner doesn’t happen to Barbara Bush.

markleggett I only get interested in how my office chair is constructed when I have something important to do. Is this bit welded? It looks very welded.


mariadiaz FAMOUS MEN: Once again, I can teach you how to sext and how to delete pics from your phone. Special discount this week! DM me.

Glinner “I was hacked” is this century’s “a witch did it”.

wishing4horses So a guy took a picture of his penis then sent it to a girl? No way!

TheRedQueen Phone tree is making me homicidal. “it sounds like you said you wanted to stab me in the face, is this correct” #ohverymuchso

massagebyted It’s bad for Rep. Weiner now, but he’ll feel even worse when I release the pics I got from Michelle Bachman. That lady is hung like a horse.

mrpilkington I say to myself, “Self,” I say, “How can I slip some root poison into the lot next door? Is there a squirrel I can pay to do this?”

ScrewyDecimal Monday and I are officially in a fight. There’s gonna be fisticuffs.

Riser_ I’m still waiting for Beavis & Butthead to weigh in on this Congressman Weiner scandal.

badbanana I just unlocked the “Living Simply Without Unnecessary Technology” badge on @foursquare!

helgagrace Have suggested we boost the library’s budget by contributing found money. Just boosted by .25 cents.

mommywantsvodka Whomever said, “thou art as lovely as a summer’s day,” has NOT spent any time near my garbage can in mid-June.

oodja “There are only two rules in television; don’t swear and don’t whip it out.” -helpful social media advice from Krusty the Clown

FrankConniff Wiener not getting it. After press conference, to prove how bad he feels, he tweeted everybody a pic of his limp penis.

EvenMoreSarah Maybe if I stay real quiet, Monday won’t notice I’m here and will go home early.

markleggett Most of my childhood memories are videogame cheat codes.

frageelay Madonna’s lyrics all make perfect sense if you imagine they were written to her cats.

giraffrocentric Okay, guys, guess the movie! (NO CHEATING!!!1) … “Nice to meet you, Harry Potter!”

killorn My dog is always so thrilled to see me come home for however long it takes him to realize I am not carrying a ham in my purse.

apelad I always feel sorry for never before seen footage. Be more assertive, footage!

Ahm76 Every time I’m disappointed in twitter, I realize I’m just disappointed in myself. I’m the one who didn’t make plans or leave the house. Me.

apodixis Assflap! That’s what I always think that duck in the insurance ad is saying.

theleanover At some point my neighbours are going to wonder what my horrendous laughter stems from and I’m going to have to say a 15 yr old kids cartoon.

LIFECOACHERS It’s great to focus on your gifts but sometimes you need to focus on what you don’t do well and feel really bad about that.

killorn You people act like you’ve never seen “I have a head for business & a bod for sin” written in purple Comic Sans on a business card before.

BillCorbett Yes, the rumors are true: my dog just ate a Japanese beetle. #ourlivinghorribleEarth

sandwichpolice I hung up first. I won the goodbye!

Sarah_PallinUSA That whole Watergate thing was bad for the economy. It’s poor fiscal planning to build gates underwater. Fish can’t even vote. #PalinHistory

eihposa There comes a time when the only thing to do is eat sour cream on taco shells. Now is that time.

ordermeanother Indiana Jones: the only thing in history that is better when there are Nazis involved.

danforthfrance If Kevorkian’s death is ironic, then the only thing that has died is what words mean.

StephenAtHome I wonder if it’s hard for a cricket doing standup at a comedy club to tell if they’re bombing.

shinyinfo Oh Youtube comments. You make me feel like a genius.

sbellelauren hope you like my new show girls gone mild we just drink chai lattes & discuss if we HAD to choose if we’d be ravenclaw or hufflepuff

Athenabee Athena finally said “tit-tays.” No more mommy/daughter Dave Chappelle.

telephase Cleaning out a Gatorade bucket, with a 1/2 inch of Kool-Aid/sugar sludge in the bottom. #livingthedream

laurahartgerink i came upstairs after some painting to find a little bare bottomed, diaperless baby in her pack n play. and so it begins. #underpantsaredumb

happyrobot I just sold a bike on CraigsList. I didn’t get murdered. I have cash.

trypnotik @ampersandwich If “disappointed the cat” is code for something I disappointed the cat all the time.

LouisPeitzman “No” means “no,” Microsoft AutoUpdate.

haridnc time to walk around the office and tell everyone exactly what I think of them.

MagpieLibrarian Actual question from an actual child, “Why is Mayor Bloomberg such a douche-bag?” #savenyclibraries

val_forrestal I think #wwf should let you use “invented” words if you can justify them. eg: BORATE – to bore everyone with your lengthy speech.

endquote Yes, I love it when you shout “Mr. Clean, Mr. Clean!” at me from across the street. Please do that again.

BridgetCallahan You know what the opposite of cool is? A smooth jazz interpretation of the State Farm Good Neighbor song.

TheNextMartha I should do a whole line of “time out videos”. Me riding my kids’ bikes, destroying their legos. Demolishing train tracks. HOW FUN for me.

loresjoberg I was sad that I had no shoes until someone pointed out that thigh-high stiletto boots do, technically, count as shoes.

willgoldstein I taught the boy a very important phrase this morning: “Mommy Pwetty”. #TenDadPoints

thegrumbles we drove by a guy parallel parking a giant green tractor so he could make a donut run. he is king of today.

guiltysquid Today I’m late because, apparently, bras are not “optional” in the office. Unless you’re a guy.

ProfessorSnack Has anyone gone back to explain to watermelon farmers what the word “seedless” actually means?

bridger_w A commercial just asked, “Who says you can’t have your shrimp and eat it too?” I’m not positive, but… Nobody?

rachaelosborn Sometimes I take Nyquil and chase it with a Red Bull and let them fight.

kerryhowell Why you don’t have me buy the Costco cake for departing coworkers: it has a dinosaur on it. And “You’re not extinct to us, Lori!” as message.

notthatkendall A little piece of advice for no one in particular: If you try to tell me I can’t watch “Baby Mama” for the 87th time, I will divorce you.

NASeason Random mid-week getaway to Newport Beach. All I’m really interested in is the king sized bed and the freedom from cat hair.

TheDollSays I see Coldplay is trending. Have they died? Have they died horribly in an appallingly pretentious and tedious accident? I do hope not.

lunchyprices Teens: Don’t do cocaine! Save it for your 30s when you’ll need it just to watch TV until 10 p.m.

What is Follow Friday? It’s a Twitter meme that I have taken a couple steps further.  See my nomination for a Shorty Award for Follow Friday here. You can read more Follow Friday goodness here. Learn more about it in my FAQ.


Scrapbook: Zorro Photobomb

5 Jun

Will I ever, ever be able to take a photo of a terrarium without Zorro not sticking his head into the frame to inspect it? No. No I will not.


29 May

Isobel sings most of the ABCs till she gets distracted. She also does a pretty good chorus of “Don’t Bite Your Friends” from Yo Gabba Gabba.

25lbs of Love

1 May

Follow Friday – Solo Parenting Edition

21 Jan

I’ve successfully accomplished week one of solo parenting. Only one more week to go!

(P.S., that sound you hear is me sobbing into a pillow.)

Tonight just might require sushi.

What is Follow Friday? It’s a Twitter meme that I have taken a couple steps further.  See my nomination for a Shorty Award for Follow Friday here. You can read more Follow Friday goodness here. Learn more about it in my FAQ.

GailSimone No one really sucks until they Seacrestfully suck.

Brain_Wash As far as I can tell, cats are a secretive race of highly skilled pimps.

StephenAtHome Turns out the cast of Hair should have been singing “The Dawning of the Age of Capricorn.”

PinkPeonies Happiness is warm cat purring on your lap.

DamienFahey Going to start flushing the toilet on conference calls from now on. Let them try and figure it out.

peterbyrnes In Los Angeles, car alarms are only useful to inform you in unison that yes, that was an earthquake.

DaveHolmes Randy Jackson just said “It’s gonna be weird sitting at that table thinking WOW- it’s a different table!” Difficult to dispute.

sucittaM It’s cute that Amazon sends me Valentine’s Day gift ideas, as if my wife expects more than just dinner and homemade sex coupons.

chickenscottpie I feel like I sound like the village idiot when I leave voicemail. Like I’d be more eloquent if I just screamed “Calling! Telephone!”

WhyIsDaddyCryin I feel pretty confident that I’m pregnant.

MrWordsWorth ‘I went to, and soon, I was chatting up sexy ancestors from my family tree!’ Ad concepts gone horribly wrong.

strnglibrarian “DICK” is yelled on the other side of the room. Then I realize someone is talking to Richard who is hard of hearing.

Lilacmess Working on a powerpoint about American cultural myths for my class and using Justin Bieber as a rhetorical punching bag #FTW

trelvix A telemarketer just called and asked for my cat. He didn’t use those exact words but that’s what he meant. Cat’s like, “Dude. Stop calling.”

trelvix “Hello. May I speak to Ivy, please?”  You want to talk to my cat? Okay. Just a second. Pinch it off, Ivy! Phone!


someecards Using ‘Force Quit’ makes me feel like a jedi knight.

SimonNRicketts I haven’t got a Nintendo Wii. I just turn on Fox News and throw punches at the telly from 10 feet away. Cheaper version. Knackered now.

Tweetin4Palin Everyone start likin’ me again & talk about how pretty & feisty I am or I’m holdin’ my breath til my Bumpit explodes.

LisaMcIntire Leave France alone! RT @kanyewest: Just saw on MSNBC they said I tried to start a twitter war with Brittany.

AndyCronin Twitter= I need to pee. Facebook= I peed! Foursquare= I’m peeing here. Quora= Why am I peeing? Youtube= Watch this pee! LinkedIn= I pee well

Bagyants If they couldn’t handle Ricky Gervais I hope these douchebags never find twitter.

DamienFahey I’m excellent at guessing which people entering CVS are headed to the “Stuff for Your Butt” aisle.

wishing4horses The kids just left to go have lunch out. I sighed at the sudden quite. PS, I have a backhoe running in my backyard.

theRratedBull My wife just opened the blinds. This shit just got real.

Jesus_M_Christ I mean, sure I’ll take the wheel, but I’m kinda drunk.

louispeitzman If I don’t reply to your message, it’s because my assistant is on vacation. Just kidding! I never let my assistant take vacations.

shinyinfo I just paid off some library fines, I feel clean again.

Brain_Wash When they stand together, Steven Tyler, Jennifer Lopez, and Randy Jackson look kind of like the worst Twilight sequel ever.

TheRedQueen Wearing these boots was maybe a mistake. But I look cute, so not a total loss.


thebenbrooks I love when Sarah Palin speaks her mind, it’s like half a haiku.

CMastication Anything worth doing is worth doing to a compulsive level of excess which causes your spouse to question your sanity.

ScrewyDecimal Lots of friends are talking about the Jets today. It’s nice to see that so many people still enjoy West Side Story.

thebookmaven Necessity is the mother of the download.

tommycm I am watching the football like a proper lad. I shouted ‘tits’ at the television.

Dalevich Country music. Because no matter how bad life gets, it can always get worse with a bit of effort.

foldinglaundry PSA: hair bows should never be larger than the child’s head. EVER.

sucittaM The fact that the self-checkout computer doesn’t say “This shit is bananas” when scanning bananas seems like a wasted opportunity.

al3x I’m going to start sneaking the phrase “the most sophisticated cyberweapon ever deployed” into the READMEs for everything I write.

squeekzoid The tag on my new pants says KEEP AWAY FROM FIRE in big red letters. Aww damn, now what am I gonna wear to hell?

colsonwhitehead My life coach just told me he’s not a life coach. He just “went along with it” that day I started talking to him.

God_Damn_Batman You either die a hero or you live long enough to see your sidekick come home with a Justin Bieber haircut.

Just_PYKA Even after I told him I was gonna hit the sack, he lay there on the floor moaning in pain, as if he didn’t see it coming.

MrWordsWorth If your avatar is a sack with a dollar sign, and you aren’t Teenage Fanclub or Snidely Whiplash, I am blocking you.

inversejaik Wasn’t aware about Kate Middleton’s modeling work. If enough royals die in a timely matter, she’ll become the UK’s first modern QuILF.

badbanana I’ve developed positive feelings towards my captors. Love you, couch and Cheetos.

pistolval The inevitable collapse of society is probably not a great retirement plan, but its all I have.

louisvirtel My sign changed and now I’m Prince.

gabedelahaye Starting a clothing line for nerds called All Fear.

amazingsoup disappointed that is not biz markie’s website. you. you don’t got what i need.

swamibooba I’m keeping warm by shoulder popping and twirling. But no jazz hands, those make me overheat.

Ch8rming Planning for the zombie apocalypse is the new planning for retirement.


What is Follow Friday? It’s a Twitter meme that I have taken a couple steps further.  See my nomination for a Shorty Award for Follow Friday here. You can read more Follow Friday goodness here. Learn more about it in my FAQ.

Organization: Before

2 Jan

In keeping with my New Year’s Goals, Anthony and I are aggressively going through the house on a cleaning and organizing crusade. Here are some of the Before shots in all their sordid glory.

Above we have the desk. It’s a large, vintage, all-steel desk that was made in the fifties and used by my father in the warehouse where he worked for nearly thirty years. It’s giant. It’s a behemoth of metal and the matching chair alone probably weighs more than I do. It’s huge, which sometimes just means there’s more room for junk. Behind it is my bulletin board. If you sent us a card in early December, you might find yourself on it.

Also if you are a Star Trek: TNG fan, prepare to be very jealous. Note the screen saver. Anthony also set the computer up to all the vocal responses of the computer of the Enterprise. In fact, our whole computer is Enterprise computer-themed. Yep. The two of us? We’re bringing dorky back.

Clutter has been building up all over the house. Behind the chair in the library is one of the areas that I shove things when I don’t want to deal with them. I call it my Secret Shame.

The majority of the Christmas toys still live in the family room. The nursery needs a total makeover into a little girl’s room.

This is what happened when I pulled all the toys out of Isobel’s room to sort and redistribute. Thank goodness for naps.

Not only are we taking out the crib and leveling up the bedroom, I’m also trying to sort through the chaos that is the closet. This was the state of things before she was born. Now it is no where near as neat, but it is just as full. She has clothes in her size plus larger and smaller. It’s a nightmare and I need to get stuff to storage, donations, and to pass on to my friend’s baby Abby. God, what a nightmare.

Before I return to work I we’re also going to tackle the garage an the attic. I hope the After photos are worth it.

As of this revision, the desk area is mostly done. I don’t have flattering After photos to share with you, but this might do for now:

Follow Friday – Presents

31 Dec

When my family arrived for Christmas morning brunch, we immediately locked Jupiter in the bedroom. He doesn’t behave in the best of times, so we weren’t taking any chances. What we weren’t expecting, however, was Zorro to dart in between the presents and tear off bits of wrapping paper and bows. And the ribbon on Isobel’s gift drove him crazy.

Right now Isobel is sitting on my lap as I type, intermittently shouting out, “Isobel! Presents! Santa!” Good times. I saved all the leftover wrapping paper this year (it always seems like such a waste) and I’m using it as packing materials for my Etsy shop. In fact, I have two packages on my desk waiting to go out, and their fragile contents are swaddled in wrapping paper.  If you order anything from me in the next month or so, expect to find some leftover Christmas cheer in your box.

What is Follow Friday? It’s a Twitter meme that I have taken a couple steps further.  See my nomination for a Shorty Award for Follow Friday here. You can read more Follow Friday goodness here. Learn more about it in my FAQ.

FakeeEtiquette It is always rude to copy that floppy.

theRratedBull Playing “The Game of Life” loses its luster when you’re an adult and play the game of life everyday.

lafix When people ask if they can get me anything, I always ask for a jetpack.

simontarr Pretty sure my father in law buys a new printer when his ink cartridges run out. He might actually be a genius.

ApocalypseHow Aqualunch #6thGradeClassicRock

ApocalypseHow “I Want to Know What Like Is” #6thGradeClassicRock

ApocalypseHow Enter Sandbox #6thGradeClassicRock

ApocalypseHow Blinded By The Masturbation #6thGradeClassicRock

schmutzie I’m still sitting here and eating chocolates. I think I’ll do this until mid-January at least.

louispeitzman NYE is the FML of holidays.

AnimalBullshit Pandas are gold-digging whores.

simontarr To be clear: by “libertard” I mean “libertarian ‘tard”. Different than “libtard” (liberal ‘tard). Or just “tard.” Which is “conservative.”

wawap There’s a terrible Facebook virus going around. It’s causing people to post old news stories as well as misinformation. Oh, wait…

thejohnblog Diamonds and perfectly timed declarations of “Yo Mama” are forever.

Greeblemonkey My 8yo has started saying “oh-em-gee” on a regular basis. So, yeah, he’s now officially the world’s youngest douchebag.

palinode My mother was a force of nurture.

eshep If you are interested in taking in some southern folk-art phallus murals, look no further than the Marian (NC) Truck Plaza men’s room.

phaemarie My nerdy teenager keeps herp-derping at me.

RailbirdJ Just called a guy abt business. I think he answered in a bathroom. On speaker. This is why I email.

ScrewyDecimal I didn’t have a commute this morning. I had an odyssey. It was the stuff of epic poems. I am Dante, and Brooklyn is the 9th circle of Hell.

shinyinfo I think I know this dude but I can’t tell. All ginger hipster dudes with beards look alike. #HipsterRacism

ordermeanother Merry Christmas, Bitches!

BadAstronomer All I Want for Christmas is Your Two Front Teeth #MerryZombiemas

BadAstronomer Have Yourself a Mary Little Christmas #MerryZombiemas

BadAstronomer Santa Claus is Shambling to Town #MerryZombiemas

BadAstronomer Little Drumstick Boy #MerryZombiemas

shinyinfo I got wished “Merry Christmas” by more Muslims than Christians this year. The “War on Christmas” is complete bullshit. #HappyHolidays

realMickFoley I wonder how many wrestling fans think of me when Marley says “Mankind was my business.”

The_Pigeon When making your resolutions, don’t forget to leave room for “letting the Pigeon drive the bus”.

CaffeinatedLiby I just found my cell phone in my bra drawer. I think that means it is time for bed.

MrWordsWorth All of Lifetime’s movies seem to have the same message of empowerment, if you consider ‘ladies, your lives are in danger’ empowerment.

guiltysquid Found some stuff of the ex’s in a closet that I’m pretty sure he’d want. Hope he’s up for some dumpster diving.

LaurelKS John just shot out of bed to be with his TV. Amused but concerned.

thejohnblog Let he who spelled chihuahua correctly the first time without Google cast the first stone.

buildingjason I am pregnant with the love-child of queso and shame.

almightygod Happy birthday Jesus. Sorry I wasn’t around when you were growing up.

sween All I wanted for Christmas was peace on Earth. But they were right. Just shot my eye out.


JerryThomas If the name of your favorite band has a punctuation mark in it, you might be a hipster. #sophisticatedfoxworthy

louispeitzman The coolest thing I did in high school was making a LiveJournal icon of Garfield reading the newspaper with lyrics from “A Day in the Life.”

Sigafoos No matter how appropriate, Elizabeth did not approve of my usage of the phrase ‘Present Orgy’ today.

Phineas It’s almost 1 pm and I don’t even care that I haven’t opened a present yet. Being an adult is bullshit.

smileydooby Its like I tell my 4 year old. If you don’t have anything nice to say, get a twitter account.

jen_talley 4 yo nephew comes in with giant Toy Story doll. “I GOT A WOODY!!”

jesus Overslept. Was in a cage match with Santa the entire evening.

ApocalypseHow Tucker Carlson says Michael Vick should be executed – specifically, “hung from a bowtie until dead.”

Sigafoos Oh, forgot to announce yesterday that I’m giving up my dream of brewing in lieu of artisanal Ethernet cable making.

juliussharpe Another Xmas of going home and telling my older relatives I invented Twitter. It’s just easier they think that.

badbanana Holiday vacation. I have reached a level of inactivity normally associated with a Kardashian library card.

inversejaik 3rd cousin’s pension now being discussed in great detail. #ohgrandma

colsonwhitehead Haters gonna hate. Butters gonna butt.


What is Follow Friday? It’s a Twitter meme that I have taken a couple steps further.  See my nomination for a Shorty Award for Follow Friday here. You can read more Follow Friday goodness here. Learn more about it in my FAQ.

Thanksgiving, Then & Now

25 Nov

The photo above was taken on Isobel’s First Thanksgiving. She was in the womb and it was a wonderful time to be pregnant: a holiday devoted to eating as much as possible and sitting around afterward, fat and happy, awaiting room in your belly for pie.

Holidays are a nice way to revisit the previous years. Here are two videos, one taken last year on Thanksgiving, and one taken a few days ago. I can’t remember how she was ever so small.


She can barely stand! Don’t worry about her falling at the end, she doesn’t cry. She’s mostly dismayed. She barely ever cried last year at this time. This year, however, she’s very keen in exercising her right to throw a fit.

At one point in the video, my sweet orange Mensa kitty Tinky walks by the camera. At the time, I never would have thought that she wouldn’t be with us this year. I miss her and Peach on a daily basis.


Isobel is so different compared to last year, but her wonderful laugh is the same.

It’s impossible not to notice Zorro in this video. He is all up ons the camera. He must think I’m recording him.

In this video you can hear a glimpse of Isobel counting. She only says up to “two” before she starts giggling (she’s anticipating tickles) but she can count up to five. Additionally, she can count backward from three. So, I’ve officially become a Horrible Bragging Parent.

Hold on a second. I think I hear my karma coming.

Follow Friday – Sarah FAILIN’ Edition

19 Nov

I’m a bit hung over from Yo Gabba Gabba. It was so incredibly fun but it involved a lot of walking while carrying a diaper bag with all of our worldly goods plus my 24-pound toddler. My hips and legs are killing me in a way that they haven’t since I was pregnant. We got back very late and I was looking forward to sleeping in, at least just a little, figuring a late night plus all the excitement would mean a full night’s sleep. Wrong! Isobel was up from 1:00 a.m. to about 3:30 a.m. She was fussing and unhappy and, from what I could tell, in teething pain from getting one of her last molars. She also has a very runny noise. I’ m so grateful I took a furlough day today because I plan to spend the day in a semi-conscious stupor.

That said we really had a fantastic time and once I’m rested I’m going to write a recap. Hint: there may have been some high-fiving.

As far as twitter memes this week, my favorite was definitely #SarahPalinBabyNames. I hate her with a consuming passion and I hope she’s hunted down by polar bears that have been rendered homeless by her destructive environmental ways. Actually, I really hope those bears shoot her from a plane. For a reality TV show.

Stupid Sarah Failin’.

What is Follow Friday? It’s a Twitter meme that I have taken a couple steps further.  See my nomination for a Shorty Award for Follow Friday here. You can read more Follow Friday goodness here. Learn more about it in my FAQ.

tysiscoe I was hoping AVG would be the thin, ultra-ribbed anti-virus protection I was looking for but the heuristics are hardtardin’ my mojoflo.

God_Damn_Batman So Harry Potter’s parents were murdered before his eyes, now he wears a black cloak and fights evil? EXPECT A CALL FROM MY LAWYERS ROWLING!!

TheRedQueen Snark makes me feel like I am rolling around in a pile of kittens. #theyseemerollin #theybehatin

stevelibrarian If I was looking for someone to provide a status report on the heart of rock and roll, I don’t think Huey Lewis would be my first choice.

MrWordsWorth I like my Thomas like I like my boys… Hardy – things you are probably best off not saying.

booksNyarn Daughter: “If I have my birthday party here, please try not to embarrass me in front of my friends.” Me: “But that is my job and only joy?”

MrWordsWorth I wish some fresh new pop song would tell me what to do with my hair.

squeekzoid Shall I compare thee to a summers’ day?/You are not as hot./…That came out wrong/Wait, come back, I’m sorry! #wanepoetic

johnmoe There once was a man from Nantucket / lovely place Nantucket / Went there on vacation once. / something something bucket. #wanepoetic

girlvaughn: someone found my blog by searching “the fucking hint: take it”

JerryThomas Hey, you in vitro embryos! Get a womb!

badbanana “Genius is one hundred percent sweatpants.” -Sweatpants Dude

AFG85 OK, Twinterest, why do you think that the “sebaceous gland” is one of my interests?

elidourado @AFG85 Even weirder: you and I SHARE an interest in the sebaceous gland.

thejohnblog Today the temperature dropped suddenly. I’m sure it has *nothing* to do with Dick Cheney arriving in Dallas this morning.

lafix Burning bridges isn’t a bad thing when the bridges are homophobic and molesty.

louispeitzman Honestly, if you can watch the Bristol Palin-The Situation safe sex PSA and still want to procreate, more power to you.

sarcasmically It disappoints me that not one single Monistat commercial uses “Ring of Fire” by Johnny Cash as an ad jingle.

BillCorbett Last night at 3 AM I briefly stopped believin’. Then: out of the blue, a phone call from Steve Perry, who was WONDERFUL. All fixed!

annakarenine Feels like I’m Snow White today, my street is full of squirrels! (Okay, it’s garbage day.)

TheOnion Oprah Invites Hundreds Of Lucky Fans To Be Buried With Her In Massive Tomb

Lilacmess Ok, who is going to go see Sinbad at Atlantis with me this weekend? We can’t miss this once in a lifetime opportunity.

NASeason The best thing about bras is taking them off.

thejohnblog Your mom’s a horcrux.

EvenMoreSarah Photo Booth provides a handy if terrifying mirror.

JerryThomas Jesus loves you, but Zeus thinks you’re stupid.

MrWordsWorth I whip my head back and forth saying, “make it stop!”

OngoingBS I hate people that follow you then list you then unfollow you then you unfollow them and then they follow you.. I’m confused. Who do I hate?

iasshole I love that no matter how batshit someone is, they can still take the Kleenex boxes off their hands & judge you on the internet.

Zaius13 If you insist on telling me about your weekend, I suggest you do it in the bathroom, as it’s the only place I’ll give a shit.

MrWordsWorth ‘Jury’s Out on Sarah Palin’s Alaska.’ I’m optimistic of a conviction for crimes against the humanities.

louisvirtel Who else will only refer to “Sarah Palin’s Alaska” by the name “Beartrap Contessa”?

badbanana It’s that time of year. Can’t stop eating cornucopias.

zombiesitcom She said “I love you.” And his heart jizzed a little. #TheAwesomestRomanceNovelEver

lafix Accidentally a vitamin “for men” and now all I can think about is the amazing array of holes that look like they could accommodate a penis.

louispeitzman At a sports bar, drinking until football makes sense.

BillCorbett Jar-Jar is seriously underrated. I find him DELIGHTFUL. #pissofftheinternet

thebookpolice 100 Grand in Debt #failedcandy

thebookpolice FEZ #failedcandy

JCP70 Rhesus Pieces #failedcandy

thebookpolice Juju Hornets #failedcandy

MrWordsWorth Trent Reznor wanted to f%*k you like an animal until he realized he’d have to walk and feed you.

phaemarie Gawd #SarahPalinBabyNames

lafix Trampoline #SarahPalinBabyNames

lafix Tarball #SarahPalinBabyNames

lafix Musket #SarahPalinBabyNames

phaemarie Scooter #SarahPalinBabyNames

DaveHolmes Piven #SarahPalinBabyNames

DaveHolmes Plop #SarahPalinBabyNames

DaveHolmes Noun #sarahpalinbabynames

DaveHolmes Hat #SarahPalinBabyNames

DaveHolmes Toast #SarahPalinBabyNames


DaveHolmes Sniz #SarahPalinBabyNames

DaveHolmes Fumblerooski #SarahPalinBabyNames

DaveHolmes Buckle #SarahPalinBabyNames

DaveHolmes Lumbo #SarahPalinBabyNames

smileydooby I went for like three weeks without tweeting and still have over five hundred followers. I have the most dedicated spambots ever

muskrat_john Dear commercial suggesting fresh fruit is too damn complicated for people to eat. Please punch yourself in the face. Forever.

BadAstronomer I have never used the phrase “rise and shine”. I have, however, told my daughter to convect and emit black body radiation.

OngoingBS The boots I wear to work are so comfortable that I forget I’m walking on my broken dreams.

danforthfrance My stages of drunkenness: 1. Hello. 2. Chatty. 3. Rants about historical popes 4. Talking in Maggie Smith’s “Miss Jean Brodie” voice

thejohnblog I want to make this Chipotle burrito a sister wife.

louispeitzman This guy on BART is trying out every single alarm tone in his phone. Someone knows how to make friends.

SuburbanSnaps Generally speaking, you don’t want to emerge from the shower to find your toddler crawling back in through the doggie door.


What is Follow Friday? It’s a Twitter meme that I have taken a couple steps further.  See my nomination for a Shorty Award for Follow Friday here. You can read more Follow Friday goodness here. Learn more about it in my FAQ.

Home Movies: Isobel Rides Again

31 Oct

Isobel doesn’t constantly try to ride Zorro like she used to, but every once and while she gives it a shot. Zorro is still not game.

Here’s a brief  30 second video that Isobel shot herself. She talks to the camera, headbutts it, and and finally kisses it.

You can hear our squabble over the camera at the end.