Tag Archives: Isobel

Follow Friday: Christmas Elf

16 Dec

Today’s Follow Friday is brought to you by Isobel’s $1.oo thrift store Santa dress. It’s the miniature version of the Christmas dress of my dreams, and since it just barely fits her this is probably the only time she will get to wear it. I’m trying to get as much mileage out of it as possible.

What is Follow Friday? It’s a Twitter meme that I have taken a couple steps further.  Learn more about it in my FAQ. See my nomination for a Shorty Award for Follow Friday here. You can read more Follow Friday goodness here.

rileyroxme Can’t wait for the day C.P.S shows up and they’re like “Twitter.” and I’m like “Hold on while I livetweet this blowjob.”

JulieFredericks Newt is having a surge. Gross.

suitcasetricks Email from my husband: “I love you and the Hamburger Helper I’m eating for breakfast.” This guy really knows how to talk to the ladies.

thejohnblog My boss is in the stall next to me. Is it brown nosing if I periodically say “Good one, boss?” Because OH GOD HE TAPPED MY FOOT

dadourianbow Get the fuck outta here you beanie wearing motherfucker. #MerryDissmas

MmeSurly Ruby just called the bad guy from Inspector Gadget “Dr. Claus” which explains why she’s been so nervous lately.

shariv67 I never thought I’d see a day when our phones were smarter than us, and yet here we are.

ProfessorSnack Crotchety: pertaining to the groin. “After a week of not bathing, he smelled crotchety.”

michellehudson Getting in a very sappy life-loving mood this morning. Must be the second cup of coffee.

eliza_evans Do not sign a professional email with ‘Hugs!’ Just don’t.

milonguera @MeganBoley I quoted The Jerk in a reply yesterday. And then favorited myself. Super winner.

neiltyson Suffering existential angst over a Pluto-less mnemonic? Try “My very Educated Mother Just Served Us Nachos”

MeganBoley And yet, I find myself quoting Anchorman in my inner dialogue multiple times a day. So I guess my inner dialogue is obnoxious.

Lilacmess @exlibris You can see Avery Brooks trying to keep that crazy tamed but sometimes he has to let it run free.

simontarr Having an allergic reaction to something. My eyes are so swollen I look like a UC Davis student.

sween Sometimes I see parents with their kids and I get jealous. [Sips beer. Plans leisure activities. Counts disposable income.] So jealous.

jberthume The Dew is required. I am doing it.

ProfessorSnack I just want to get toned enough that dogs want to hump my leg again. #NewYearsResolution

MmeSurly I think Gwyneth Paltrow and I have a lot in common. For instance: I think we both hate Gwyneth Paltrow.

AuntiPax Oh THAT was the deputy? Ok then I guess I shot him too. My bad.

MariaMelee The BBQ I had for lunch is haunting me in a profound way.

pnkrcklibrarian Aging, alternative hipsters apparently spend their nights stuffing balls and listening to a lecture on land tax in England from 1692 – 1963

MrWordsWorth Zombies celebrate the holidays with a Perducken: a person stuffed with a duck and a chicken.

shelldash Google Music is apparently offering me (ME!) “free Dave Matthews Band concerts”. Wondering if Bing Music might counter with “free earplugs”.

CandyWarhole You don’t know what you got ’til its diagnosed by a licensed physician.

theRratedBull When Texans ask me why I moved to Kansas I just tell ’em I’m a storm chaser because it’s the only reason they could possibly comprehend.

ecsuperhero I have the best work Secret Santa. So far I’ve gotten a wine glass and a McDonald’s g/c. Alcohol and fatty food? YOU COMPLETE ME, SANTA.

sgnp If you want to know how long a minute is, my daughter will be happy to ask you every single second of one.

badbanana My favorite holiday drink is the Little Drummer Boy. It’s one part rum, three parts pum.

donni Tuneless whistling is about to be the #1 cause of murder-suicides on this bus.

slackmistress I don’t think I know who Ryan Gosling is which is probably a sign that my ladyparts are going to fall out.

sarcasmically …Is UPS not doing too well? Because the UPS man just rolled up to my house in a golf cart.

jenstatsky A lot of oddly-shaped presents get a bad wrap.

sarcasmically Just yelled “USE YOUR WORDS” at the whining dog, so it’s probably time I called it a day.

rstevens Warning to all who visit: My wifi is now called Invisible Touches

badbanana “I enjoy working with a hammer, but I don’t want a blue collar job.” – Everyone who eventually becomes a judge.

theleanover If reality was better we probably wouldn’t need pretend talking.

pilotbacon I only drink coffee so I can stare at a blank Final Draft document for longer than usual.

mikeleffingwell Super surprised to find out the most popular song played at orgies is “You’ve Got a Friend in Me”

johnmoe Still unclear whether the next debate will be hosted by Larry the wacky neighbor from Three’s Company or Jo from Facts of Life.

mylifeasadad I’m scraping Alela’s two day old butternut squash purée off my sweater because really, no one will ever know.

tommycm if today were a labrador, i’d have it humanely put down.

steenyweeny i’m named after an ancient sumerian god who used a giant spiked hockey stick to clobber the skulls of those who said ‘holy doodle’ too much.

sarcasmically When is “fuckton” going to be officially accepted as a unit of measurement? –because it is probably the one I use most.

ohnoCAPSLOCK Jack is having a growth spurt. I just leaked milk through a breast pad and three layers of shirts. #sexyandclassy

davepolak I am coming up with my strategic game plan to maximize the amount of ham I eat over the holidays.

sgnp Not a big fan of someone entering the restroom immediately after me and then choosing the stall next to mine, like we’re in a horrible race.

JRehling Like my desk wasn’t messy enough already, now it’s totally covered with Higgs Bosons.

InfiniteChicken You haven’t heard Christmas music until you’ve heard it in a lobby, transposed into augmented minors by a jazz combo.

RailbirdJ Worst Christmas gift? A dolphin t-shirt. Take a second to look at my avi. Do I look like a dolphin guy to you?

helgagrace It’s that time of year! People coming in to the library to find out their property values.

ajthizzle Ok. I need to do something productive. Butt, say goodbye to couch. No, don’t linger. It’s better this way.

MassageByTed In the way that protesters sometimes throw red paint on people in furs, I propose throwing some sort of ersatz jizz on guys in Tapout gear.

apodixis I don’t really want to go to Funkytown, to be honest.

BillCorbett I finally get it! “We built this city on rock-and-roll,” meaning they smothered and crushed rock-and-roll under huge buildings, killing it.

EvenMoreSarah Me to the dog: “Come here, little fellow.” My BF: “Did you just call the dog a dildo?” Oh sure, *I’m* the one who needs my ears cleaned

JerryThomas Klout “believes” that I am “influential about iPhone.” Do you hear that, iPhone? (give me a free iPhone)

CParkhurst1 I strongly suspect that after the fourth day of Christmas, someone started dropping hints that more bird gifts would not be appreciated.

MisterSnuggl3s I have to carb load before brushing my teeth. In case you were curious about what kind of athlete I am.

Patheticist You can unconditionally love children and animals, other adult humans must have a few conditions.

hipstermermaid Beer before liquor, never been sicker. Liquor before weed, forget how to rhyme.

MeganBoley Twitter, I never say goodnight to you. I always just doze off in mid-conversation like we are at a 5th grade sleepover. Goodnigdkendkjszzzzz

CanuckLibrarian Sometimes you just need a little Kool & the Gang.

kaitlin_olson My boobies are getting big. I want to say that makes up for not being able to drink, not sleeping well and often peeing my pants.

RothNotIRA “I love you dada. I love you couch.” Well, at least I’m on par with furniture.

corrinrenee Autocorrect just changed my name to Cotton Floater.

SpaghettiJesus EVERY KNIFE BEGINS WITH KAY. #HappyHolidays

theleanover If I was a Hispanic hair dresser I would name my salon “Jesus Dyed.”

NoReservations What Would Jesus Eat? Apparently pigeon.

muffpunch “Who’s this Ting Ting person and why is he in my CD player?” Oh, mom.

apelad Why is everyone so concerned about my eyesight? Every email I get begins with “having trouble viewing this message?” The answer is no!!

Greeblemonkey We’re working on more homemade Christmas presents tonight, which basically means I am covered head to toe with modpodge.

cheekyattitude Took a while, but I overcame my fear of butternut squash.. in its defense, it wasn’t really trying to maim me.

burnstand AWW YEAH! Dropping food flakes in to my brand new keyboard! This thing is gonna be disgusting before you can say “gluttony”!

notthatkendall In the massage train of life, I am on the wrong end.

mikeleffingwell There are no atheists in foxholes. All foxes are Hindu.

The_Pigeon Just did a 5K run. I put 5 thousand dollars in my pants & got outta there.

DachsundDays And I saw a gigantic evil badger on a throne with 13 chihuahuas at his feet, yipping the theme from The Omen . . .

NicLewis “The best part of waking up? No, you’ve got Folgers in your cup.” #HonestSlogans

SpaghettiJesus “The world runs on starch and animal fat” #honestslogans

ecareyo It’s almost like the E! channel specifically knows that I’ll dedicate many hours watching a countdown of the most notorious lady murderers

JohnFugelsang Mitt Romney is as genuine as a mass emailing from Phoenix University.

JerryThomas If you need anybody to lie utterly motionless on the couch for six hours tomorrow let me know.

CorporateMonkey “only way I’m dropping trou in front of that many people is if there are Quaaludes involved.” -actual convo occurring in my office right now

ncguk “We spent so long looking for the Higgs boson, and all the time it was in our hearts.” — Higgs Boson Christmas Special

What is Follow Friday? It’s a Twitter meme that I have taken a couple steps further.  Learn more about it in my FAQ. See my nomination for a Shorty Award for Follow Friday here. You can read more Follow Friday goodness here.

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Follow Friday – Owl Apron

2 Dec

Last weekend some friends and I visited a craft fair and I splurged at bit (thank you, Etsy shop!) and bought a lovely green cowl and this child-sized owl apron for Isobel. I’ve been looking for an apron for her for a long time, and Isobel loves it. She likes to wear it around the house while carrying her various treasures around in the front pouch. Here she is helping me clean the kitchen. Such a good helper!

What is Follow Friday? It’s a Twitter meme that I have taken a couple steps further.  Learn more about it in my FAQ. See my nomination for a Shorty Award for Follow Friday here. You can read more Follow Friday goodness here.

jeff_ratfamily Even though no music is playing I’m doing my Mighty Mighty Bosstones dance in front of everyone & I invite you to do the same.

preschoolgems “I’m thankful for science, and mommy and daddy.”

TNG_S8 Picard is trapped inside a sentient turbolift. A clip show highlights the most memorable “Picard is trapped on a turbolift” moments.

rachel_nk my family’s review of pumpkin spice seltzer: it tastes like a yankee candle.

ProfessorSnack It appears that a cock ring isn’t part of the turkey preparation.

thejohnblog This turkey is making me sleepy. Seriously, he keeps going on and on about his shortcuts when he commutes to work.

girlwithatail My neighbors are outside nailing a turkey to a cross. They’re new to this country.

julieklausner Smurves.

steenyweeny instead of praying before you eat yell FINISH HIM and i promise your food will taste better every single goddamn time.

NASeason Remember when 4am was the time you came home, and not the time your baby made you get up for the day? Me neither.

heliumcell Happy Thanksgiving to EVERYONE!!! WooHoo!!! Happiness! Camaraderie! Thanking!!! YELLING!!! #PILLS #CAPSLOCK

MrWordsWorth The Macy’s Parade is an hour of entertainment stretched out over three hours.

YourAuntDiane Hard to keep the dozens of turkeys hiding from the Turkey Holocaust in the attic quiet. And none are writing in the diary I gave them.

louisck Happy Thanksgiving to all my followers who aren’t murderers. I wonder how many murderers follow me. Aw happy Tday to them too.

theleanover It’s weird how UC Davis added a question to their application asking how allergic you are to capsaicin and riot batons.

helgagrace Was just taken by a strong urge to clean all the things in the kitchen, but I managed to snap out of it!

TNG_S8 A virus that accesses genetic memory transforms Troi into a primeval warrior. Technically, Wesley still lives with his mom.

tehawesome Just had to stop myself from shouting “Wu-Tang Clan ain’t nothin’ to fuck with!” upon winning a free game in Lord of the Rings pinball.

steenyweeny does gravy ice cream cake count as dessert or an entree for this pot luck?

jess_mc You will have to pry this pie from my cold fat hands.

delrayser It’s like that Walking Dead scene of zombies devouring a horse, but replace the zombies w/Wal-Mart shoppers & the horse w/$2 waffle irons.

mommywantsvodka I wonder if Siri knows where my pants are.

BridgetCallahan Fact: On Black Friday 1997, thousands of people were murdered in their sleep by Tickle Me Elmo. #BlackFriday

batemanimation I’m at Starbucks this Black Friday. People are trampling each other to get an Everything With Cheese Bagel. Oh, the bagelity.

AntDeRosa Everybody relax, they’re putting together a Superdupercommittee

notthatkendall “If being married doesn’t mean I can make you watch Home Alone repeatedly then I don’t understand what we’re doing here”

Alena29 I just uploaded a photo on FB that shows what it look like when you’re carrying an actual baby and a food baby…at the same time.

tehawesome That first trip to the bathroom after Thanksgiving is like a religious experience. And by that I mean an exorcism.

pourmecoffee Got some incredibly cheap bundled mortgages at the Goldman Sachs doorbuster sale.

wordlust Mmm…turgluten.

tehawesome The secret behind my mom’s excellent Thanksgiving butter is that she adds just a hint of mashed potatoes.

MeganBoley Thankful for a growing family and elastic pants.

MrsFridayNext Twitter, if I said just how thankful I am for you, people who don’t use twitter would look at me REAL funny. They don’t understand our love.

FarrenSquare What is Cyber Monday? Guilt-free-cyber-sex Day, I assume.

johnmoe The Kiss Army seemed too heavy so I signed up for the Kiss National Guard. I like them one weekend a month.

himissjulie Under my breath, as I try to figure out how to staple a booklet for a child: “I have master’s degree…I have a master’s degree…!”

mat Poopin’

hereslizz When helping my girl play dress up I need to teach her the fine line between well accessorized and bag lady.

crunchyvtmommy I always look on the bright side but damnit I wanted to buy that creepy elf and terrorize my husband.

bebehblog We got our Christmas tree! Hunted & killed it ourselves, like good Americans.

SwEtMrciflCrap Me to FIL: “I got Uncle Joe a Fidora”
“Dora, who’s Dora?”
“No, a hat-I got Uncle Joe a hat.”
“He’s allergic to cats!”
Tonight should be fun.

stegasp I have yet another Thanksgiving dinner with family today. If anyone needs me I will have retreated to a dark corner of my brain.

badbanana You know it’s been a successful Thanksgiving weekend when your watch doesn’t fit anymore.

HeathRobots Either my belly button is bleeding, or I really let things get out of control with the cranberry sauce.

wordsinmymouth And just introduced my dad to honey badger. It was a magical father/daughter moment.

mylifeasadad Completing the Star Wars trilogy tonight with the kids. Trying to convince Des that Ewoks are not doggies.

MrWordsWorth This is the time of year when I start to question some of the endorsement deals Santa made.

timcarvell I wish Etsy were a physical store, just so I could see people punching each other on Black Friday over crocheted Ramones shirts for birds.

Angel__Bee “ran out of pants” is not a phrase I like to hear from Allie’s teachers upon picking her up from daycare.

ramisalame If Snoop Dogg told me his hobby was sculpting, I’d be like “Fo’ chisel?” and we’d high-five and laugh endlessly.

ecsuperhero My coworkers just acted appalled at me eating cookie dough straight from the tub. I thought they knew me.

InfiniteChicken I’m always getting the Wayans and the Mayans confused; which ones did the blood sacrifices?

theleanover I gave up on aphorisms; now I write affordisms. This one is only 10 cents if you act now.

EugeniaMorpho Most people are embarassed by the porn in their browser history. I am embarassed by google seaches like “lyrics Paula Abdul Rush Rush”.

InfiniteChicken @theleanover Lucky. I’ve only had sloppy, random sex in an art gallery bathroom. (Thomas Kinkade retrospective—hard to NOT get horny.)

FakePewResearch People talking to themselves on the bus this morning: 35% Have a phone; 62% Don’t have a phone; 3% Undecided.

SteveHuff A dude with a steam shovel for a hand is destroying my neighbor’s car. #CyborgMonday

cbnickras Googling “record store cat” yields a hit for “Records Store Cat Jobs” at simplyhired. Yes, I will take that job please.

muffpunch The phones are down at work. It’s a Cyber Monday miracle!

smileydooby Ever have one of those days where you think maybe those really WERE the droids you were looking for?

muffpunch Waiting for my boyfriend to log on to AIM for Cyber Monday.

stray Dear world: stop using the prefix “cyber” until we actually have Internet-enabled brain implants (a la “Ghost in the Shell”).

joeinverarity GET BABY JESUS OUT OF YOUR UNDERWEAR! — me, right now.

mikeleffingwell If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around… free tree!!!

louisvirtel Yes, I have weak gay limbs, but please don’t mock my Masculine Dystrophy.

wordlust I see Paris, I see France… Man, this LSD is top-notch.

johnmoe “Potatoes, I suppose.” #FirstDraftStateMottoes

MmeSurly Me: What sort of books are you gonna get at the library?
Henry: BOY books. Me: What are those about? Henry: Girls.

johnmoe I honestly didn’t expect Twitter to last this long. It’s like Kajagoogoo coming out with their 20th album and it’s actually pretty good.

MrWordsWorth Got out the boxes of Christmas decorations. There is no going back now.

theleanover Nude Gingrich. #NailedIt

chickenscottpie Homework from my piano teacher: “Get drunk tomorrow night and practice this.”

MassageByTed In light of the evidence, I’m forced to conclude that, at some point, my testicles were much, much larger than they are now.

jberthume I am more angry about my Doritos Double XP Call of Duty code having already been used than a grown man ought to be, I suppose.

Patheticist Sometimes I feel below average then I click on a trending topic and ALAKAZAM! I’m a comparative genius.

Patheticist Radio Shack is the most literal name of any store.

mikeleffingwell No one ever talks about what an asshole Toddler Jesus was.

slackmistress Can I call in fat to work? Asking for myself.

LovesOfLife Maybe, just maybe that 9pm coffee was a bad idea.

JRehling If you’re planning your Christmas shopping, I’d like some new golf clubs and total power over the dead.

paulverhoeven The movie ‘The Ring’ should be renamed ‘Renember that one time, when I hugged that corpse in a disused well for nothing?’.

MariaMelee My effing PMS is like something out of Neverending Story. ARTAAAAXXXXXXXXXX.

cryanathus It’s the best thing ever when your farts sound like you are unzipping a suitcase.

cryanathus My patronus is a honey badger.

What is Follow Friday? It’s a Twitter meme that I have taken a couple steps further.  Learn more about it in my FAQ. See my nomination for a Shorty Award for Follow Friday here. You can read more Follow Friday goodness here.

Scrapbook: Sleepy

13 Nov

Follow Friday: Grocery Store

7 Oct

Here I am, taking photos of my kid in the grocery store. Again. Enjoy!

What is Follow Friday? It’s a Twitter meme that I have taken a couple steps further.  Learn more about it in my FAQ. See my nomination for a Shorty Award for Follow Friday here. You can read more Follow Friday goodness here.

rstevens The glass can be half-full, but my battery will always be half-empty.

keli_h oh, nothing … just sitting here eating cold leftover rotisserie chicken out of a baggie.

lovegrrbottle So we thought the giant metal contraption left in our garage was a large composter, but turns out it’s a large bingo wheel. We win?

thegrumbles model home toilets DO work. #tipoftheday

theleanover Prof just walked by and looked at my screen: Twitter, Favstar, Night Court. I’m now out of the B range.

allisonthemeep Audrey is saying, “meow” and pointing at the computer. Time for some serious kitty video watching on youtube, you guys.

trumpetcake My hand puppet doesn’t take requests, it only sings “Moon River” at the top of its lungs. Everyone in this Bloodmobile is loving it!

Athenabee Autocorrect correct just made me sign an email message as Mafia Brocus 😡

lovegrrbottle @Cre8BeautyDaily @milonguera there was the time I taught my little brother to say “I wanna be a stripper!” when he grew up.

MeganBoley Goals: pay bills. Procure Chipotle. #aimhigh

EvenMoreSarah Apple introduced a new phone. If you like Apple, you may be interested. If you don’t, you may not be. There. That’s a whole day of tweets.

ProfessorSnack Like the premium cable companies, I will start offering new tweet content on a limited basis every 1 1/2 years. We’re between seasons now.

MrWordsWorth That bag of Doritos was the second best lover I ever had.

steenyweeny why is my eyeball quivering? what does it know that my brain does not?

GoonSquadSarah If a bowl of Count Chocula has 10% the recommended daily allowance of Vitamin C, then I need to eat 10 bowls of it. Right?

hotdogsladies My benchmarks say iPhone 4 is now getting “accidentally dropped on the sidewalk” 46% more often than previous things we don’t tell our wife.

MassageByTed A lot of people in the Midwest seem to think that it’s possible to dress up a sweatshirt.

johnmoe Little known fact: Chris Christie’s full name is Christopher Chris Christo Topher Kristofferson Christie Kristi Vicki Barcelona.

adiopink The only time the front doorbell rings is when someone is selling something. I should probably take the insincere “Welcome” plaque down.

slackmistress I love when @betheboy & I tag-team dinner. (By that I mean we individually have sex with our dinner.)

PlumeriaSprite @exlibris You need a black widow killing Helper Roomba.

maggiesox I am so very glad we didn’t watch Dexter during dinner.

mermaidpants Someone in the library is singing “I Just Can’t Wait to Be King.”

80sMomKara Hipsters: Now you pretend to not care how silly you look. When you get to be my age, you won’t care for real.

ProfessorSnack According to Twitter, “The” appears to be the most popular first name given to babies for the last couple of decades.

Angel__Bee Nothing says professionalism like finding peanut butter in your work bag.

real_danimal Some days it is Difficult. You may find it hard to Do Things. Here is a slogan you may want to repeat: Proceed As If Not Doomed.

bitchylibrarian I just found chocolate on my forehead. So THAT’S where that went.

eihposa Peggy Bundy is my spirit animal

OngoingBS Rappers are soft. I wish I only had 99 problems.

BillCorbett If you love someone, set them free! (“Them” = all those other people you kidnapped and imprisoned, annoying your loved one.) #grammar #Sting

lindseylu Was eaten by mosquitoes the other night so I guess they’re my boyfriend now.

markleggett Where do burps go? Heaven?

badbanana I ate so much candy corn yesterday, I just pooped a candle.

killorn Of all the things you can say about @courtneystodden, “master of alliteration” is probably the most surprising.

MmeSurly I just pulled way too many muscles to ever be considered young again.

theleanover Went to three art galleries today. Symphony tonight. Just in case you need a reason to beat me up, jocks.

LPCookbook Help I am in Urban Outfitters

Squirreljustice Thinking about moving back to NC and opening a chain of consignment stores called “Play It Again Jorts.”

jonniker If Dexter ruins my crush on Mos Def, I’m going to be PISSED. He’s one of my most sacred longtime fake boyfriends.

Lilacmess Got to hear a 4 yr old sing Flo Rida today at the shooting range. That’s pretty high on the Reno Scale.

theleanover Installed rabbit ears on my mom’s TV. The only channel we get shows football so now I’m being forced into manhood.

UnicornFlavored I like to not look a twitter for 5 hours and then reply to all your old tweets.

shinyinfo Is there cleaning staff on the Enterprise or is there just an army of roombas?

FlyteAphrodite The Time Traveler’s Wife movie has stuff in it I forgot from when I read the book. Apparently there’s a character that travels through time.

ClevelandPoet Not only did I talk to my shoelaces as they came untied but what I said was “are you serious bro?” #wwwyki

bitchylibrarian I just put my hoodie on backwards. It’s going to be that kind of day.

beingthefunmama Anytime I see or hear “Istanbul,” I must sing “Not Constantinople.”

dejah_thoris I think my jeans are finally baggy enough to start that #nerdcore rap career I’ve been threatening to get into.

ecsuperhero I wasn’t sore after running six miles, but after scrubbing the kitchen floor, I can hardly walk. Housework is dumb.

anneheathen Just picked up no fewer than 14 dog toys from the living room. We have 2 dogs. This is what DINKs do.

UnicornFlavored My kid suddenly doesn’t like pizza? I’d send her back, but she’s a lot bigger than she was when she came out.

allisonthemeep “I believe children are the future.” – Whitney Houston. WRONG! It’s robots.

BugginWord OH: Irish fairies are jerks-always kidnapping babies and stuff. Stay away from those woodland creeps. #ILoveBookStores

TheRedQueen Groupon just offered me 82% off a pearl necklace. Slow down, Groupon, you are moving a little fast.

EvenMoreSarah I want a week alone in a hotel room with no obligations outside of drinking and getting my hair highlighted.

Angel__Bee Apparently not one, but two people were brought to my blog through the search “baby hamsters.”

Lilacmess I’m going to write a memoir about my experience here. I’ll call it: “My Life as a PhD Student: Fear, Doubt, Uncertainty, and Syfy TV.”

stevelibrarian Knuffle Bunny #fridayreads

lauracope LOL like nobody’s watching. thanks for making my Friday, dudebrah on the Coupa patio.

crunchyvtmommy I’m giving this baby my phone and spacing out for the next 18 months.

jenstatsky Every rose has its thorn. Every office has its Sheila.

TheRedQueen If I ever figure out who is the one letting their dogs bark all night I will find a way to pipe the sound of my kid screaming in their house.

milonguera A not quite 4 year old’s version of a fire drill is super awesome. Half telling you what to do and lots of THERE WAS NO REAL FIRE soothing.

Mama_Mash So, my husband’s first Klout perk…was a denim trucker hat. WOW.

pistolval Driving by the high school always reminds me to start saving for boarding school.

willradik The world around us exists because some atoms want to give an electron and some want to take it. That’s right. Atoms are doin’ it. #science

helgagrace I love Past Anna. She put M&Ms in my drawer for just this sort of moment.

mat Sometimes, not often, but sometimes, I find myself wishing commenters had to enter a home address to register so I could bring them cookies

sgnp I imagine Heck is a broken-down amusement park version of Hell. Pretty empty, nothing really works. The Darned shuffle lazily, bored.

notthatkendall The fact that working from home and streaming Netflix have grown in popularity at about the same time can’t be a coincidence.

LisaMcIntire Free campaign idea: send cantaloupes to any candidate or elected official railing against food safety laws.

Athenabee I want to put shock collars on the neighbours that leave their dogs out to bark 20 hours a day. Not the dogs, the actual neighbours.

FlyteAphrodite The question, folks, is whether or not I can locate a building that’s on the same street as my own home.

colsonwhitehead It takes more muscles to frown than to smile. Nothing good comes easy, people.

mikeleffingwell For my audition, I will be doing a monologue from Cat on a Hot Tin Roof: “Meow! Fuck that’s hot! My paw pads! A tin roof? A TIN roof?!”

whithonea I can’t believe my kids want to eat AGAIN. They just had breakfast 5 hours ago.

EmperorNorton Sincere conservatives, broadminded centrists, and thoughtful progressives made this country great. The #teaparty wants to undo that.

elliemce Thanks for holding the door open for me, but I’ve been practicing opening doors for months, so this is kinda supposed to be my moment.

jerryrenek Every generation gets the nip slip it deserves.

slackmistress If you can’t beat ’em, create a master race of tiny robots to destroy them.

MassageByTed Employees must wash hands before fist-bumping.

Greeblemonkey Working on a school project with Dex, where he has to build a model of a building. He chose – wait for it – The Muppet Theater.

WindsorGrace My mom just said her dog is the Jackie Kennedy of dogs.

steenyweeny trying to clean the kitchen from my bed is challenging but i’m pretty sure i can do it.

LouisPeitzman The fact that I’m watching Halloween: Resurrection means that Tyra Banks has already won.

shinyinfo I hope Obama somehow incorporates “Bringing back Arrested Development” into his 2012 campaign.

What is Follow Friday? It’s a Twitter meme that I have taken a couple steps further.  Learn more about it in my FAQ. See my nomination for a Shorty Award for Follow Friday here. You can read more Follow Friday goodness here.

Scrapbook: Isobel’s Perfect Heart

2 Oct

Anthony and I were spending some time outside with Isobel one evening when she took the chalk and drew a perfect heart. “I drew a heart!” she said proudly. Anthony and I were surprised to say the least. I ran to get my camera, but of course by the time I came back with it she had scribbled all over it. But it’s there. Her perfect heart.

Follow Friday: Vintage Chairs

9 Sep

Our weekly Farmer’s Market has lately been populated with adorable vintage chairs,  and after walking by this adorable turquoise set of patio chairs and tables I broke down and brought them home. I would have loved to add these colorful children’s chairs to our home, but considering our decorating theme is already close to what I call “Goldilocks,” I had to pass. Unfortunately.

If Isobel’s outfit looks familiar it’s because I took these photos on the day when she and Kingston spontaneously started dancing. Though, really, this is the outfit she would wear every day, if I let her.

What is Follow Friday? It’s a Twitter meme that I have taken a couple steps further.  Learn more about it in my FAQ. See my nomination for a Shorty Award for Follow Friday here. You can read more Follow Friday goodness here.

filigreegirl Just realized I’ve been here since 8:00 and I have no idea where I put my glasses.

toddmarrone The stick figure decals on my car’s rear window represent the people I’ve hit.

theneener OH at the Labs: Could’ve been the president of the company, could’ve been a vagrant. You never know with those cowboy hats.

TheNextMartha Actually remembering that today was picture day is my greatest accomplishment this year.

RitleySammich “I’d tap that.” – The Raven, on your chamber door

wawoodworth Bacon and the Art of Motorcycle Repair #replacebooktitleswithbacon

quietjenn The Year of Magical Bacon #replacebooktitleswithbacon

LaurelKS The Call of the Bacon #replacebooktitleswithbacon

goodinthestacks Who Moved My Bacon? #replacebooktitleswithbacon

lauracope Their Eyes Were Watching Bacon #replacebooktitleswithbacon

iamfoxyroxie A Million Little Bacons #replacebooktitleswithbacon

NiceDeb All I Really Needed To Know About Bacon I Learned in Kindergarten #replacebooktitleswithbacon

yowhatsthehaps  The way Al Green feels when he sings to ladies is pretty much how I feel about pop tarts. (I looooooooooooove them.)

NASeason You know what sound I love hearing when I’m hooked to the breast pump? Cat vomiting on carpet, that’s what.

jerryrenek If you dye your dog’s fur, there should be a special corner of Kansas set aside for you.

dingman35 I used to wake up to Kenny Loggins Dangerzone as my alarm but I don’t anymore, because the day can’t possibly get any better after that

slackmistress I still fit into my jeans which means I’ve failed Labor Day.

shariv67 Avoid unfortunate teasing like Mitch the bitch or Lester the molester by naming all your kids Orange.

That_Biz I will survive, until nap time, hey hey!

MassageByTed If only Dorothea Lange had used Instagram, the Depression would’ve been way more awesome.

rstevens Microblogging is so 2007. I’m nanoblogging now.

GoonSquadSarah I just broke my lawnmower. Somehow that makes me feel like a badass.

ohpeetie Gross. Mom made buckwheat pancakes for breakfast. I didn’t eat any because I have a strict No Eating Little Rascals policy.

frknrica Please use your indoor voices, Mommy had a lot of rum last night.

LouisPeitzman If I say, “gurl,” that means you look fierce. If I say, “guuurl,” you’re being crazy, or I started saying “gurl” and it turned into a burp.

TheRedQueen How do the actors on The Fresh Beat Band live with themselves?

rstevens How many buses could a Busey bus if a Busey could bus buses

rudepundit I wish corporations were people. I’d drag Bank of America out of a bar and kick its ass.

joeinverarity If you call girls “bitches,” I automatically assume you have a small, misshapen penis.

MakeMommyCoffee Nothing makes a girl feel more beautiful than when 1 of her eyelids swells to 2x it’s normal size. Enter villagers shouting “KILL THE BEAST”

luckyshirt There are going to be so many kids named Kirkland once Costco starts selling babies.

kitchenartist I wish this pie graph I’m working on was made of, or at least about, actual pie.

ordermeanother REMINDER: The beard is a gift, and gifts differ among men.

BenMcCool Morning TV makes me want to hurt people. Preferably the people responsible for morning TV.

InfiniteChicken What did you think about the end of ‘Inspection’? I think Bulba Fett lives. #confusedscifi

KeepingYouAwake Big news: Books-a-Million has a coffee shop in it, too! Also news: There are still bookstores! Take that, future!

slackmistress If I expect the unexpected then isn’t it expected and this is where I get eaten by clowns, I think.

LifeOfLiriope Why do sexy slut terms reference furry animals? Sex kitten, fuck bunny. I wanna be a skank snake. Hot or not? *hiss*

Mike_FTW No one at home is picking up so it’s safe to assume the dog ate them and I should start a new family. Also, they don’t want ice cream.

markleggett Almost choked to death at work on some broccoli. No way. I ain’t going out like that.

rrrobbed My phone told me I had a twitter message, but when I went to check it, there was nothing. DAMN YOU TWITTER, DON’T BE A TEASE, I’M SENSITIVE.

TwoAdults I am willing to bet that the Michelin Man and the Stay Puft Marshmallow guy are related.

VaginaDrum Getting donuts but BEFORE I DO, making sure not to shower or comb my hair or even resemble anything close to someone who can afford donuts.

shelbyfero I once put chocolate chips into a Hot Pocket so I can tell you a thing or two about dying alone.

peteec How about “Don’t wear white ever”, unless it’s all linen and you are also a Columbian cocaine king pin.

slackmistress This moisturizer promised to erase years of my life but I still remember 1991. 😦

hermbot BREAKING: Candy Corn is in season.

owlparliament All of this unemployment has really sharpened up my whistle’s vibrato.

TheDailyShow This is what you’re doing with your Labor Day? Sitting in your underwear checking Twitter? #writteninunderwear

nedroid Guess what, kids? When you’re an adult you can eat a birthday cake any day of the year. They don’t teach you that in school.

TheTweetOfGod Don’t bite the hand that feeds you. Lick it. It lasts longer.

markleggett Scientists have yet to discover how to do their own hair in the mornings.

MassageByTed I’m Rubbin’ It!™ #OtherAwesomeMcDonaldsSlogans

kwmurphy Painting my new office. I’m color-blind, so I’ve chosen Fire Engine Green.

sarcasmically Mary Witucki, wherever you are, know that you’ll regret not taking this total stranger off your right-wing email list when I asked nicely.

ButternutSquash Just said to me “With an attitude like that, I’m never sucking his baby’s feet.” Lord, I do love a random conversation now and then.

miss_shortskirt My first massage ever in 90 minutes. I’M NERVOUS!!! What if I like it too much and cry because I can’t ever afford another?

MmeSurly I can only assume the PT Cruiser in front of me ran off the road just now because it became sentient and suddenly realized what it was.

TheNextMartha Wow. That mom picking up her kid must have forgot that those jean shorts she’s wearing show her labia.

InfiniteChicken In case you were curious, it is entirely possible to eat too much pineapple. Learn from my error.

benmarvin Pro Tip: Take your shirt off when you poop. Trust me.

BridgetCallahan I don’t know about you, but there are times when I really have to stop myself from posting Craigslist ads as performance art.

LastMomOnEarth Where can I get battery operated twinkle lights? If my girls are being wizards this year, they’re going to be spectacular wizards.

EvenMoreSarah Looking through Facebook & I see so much tattoo money that should have been spent on education or possibly dental work.

steenyweeny that sense of profound loss you’re all suddenly feeling is down to me forgetting my sunglasses at my desk.

kellyoxford It’s too bad that everyone who has a solution for everything is at home commenting on the internet.

CorporateMonkey it’s nice to feel wanted and all, but I hope getting hit on in that truck stop won’t be the highlight of my day. #roadtrip

apodixis I wish the cat poop were made of chocolate. Because then I would be like, look, there’s chocolate on the floor!

jordanlebaron My 8 year old thought a “Big Mac” was a new Apple computer.

JPHaddadio I got tennis elbow from opening bite size Snickers. But nobody knows what I’m talking about when I call it Snickers elbow.

theleanover There. Now any accusations I can’t lip sync perfectly to “Gold Soundz” will be false. Time to get back to work!

ScrewyDecimal Is there a way to say “Well, maybe you shouldn’t have waited until the last minute to do your book report” without sounding like my mother?

ToBreatheAgain Learning from the littlest family member. If you do a good job, you clap for yourself because you are so awesome.

ecareyo Hope everyone takes the “Shh, it’s a surprise!” part of my wedding invitation very seriously!

elloyd74 Accidentally typed “The Kitchen God’s Wide” instead of “Wife” into the library catalog. I hope so. I wouldn’t trust a skinny Kitchen God.

ghweldon When you turn & see that there’s only one set of footprints in the sand, that’s when Jesus was walking in your tracks to confound pursuers.

funnyoneliners Women shouldn’t have children after forty. Because, really, forty children should be enough.

WendiAarons Guy just walked in wearing a “New Dad” tshirt. With his newborn, dark circles & dazed wife, I don’t think he really needs it.

LIFECOACHERS When you were a child you thought as a child; now you are grown and must put away childish things. At least when other adults are looking.

GuyEndoreKaiser I bet dying vultures have lots of awkward moments with their friends.

pnkrcklibrarian When with my mother, I just want to open a vein and pipe the vodka directly in.

EvenMoreSarah Ugh this radio ad where they argue about how to say “caramel.” IT IS NOT ACTUALLY UP FOR DEBATE THERE ARE THREE SYLLABLES.

morninggloria Maybe she’s born with it. Maybe it’s highly contagious.

What is Follow Friday? It’s a Twitter meme that I have taken a couple steps further.  Learn more about it in my FAQ. See my nomination for a Shorty Award for Follow Friday here. You can read more Follow Friday goodness here.

Scrapbook: Isobel’s First Kitten

31 Jul

Recently we were at my parents’ house for dinner and Isobel finished before the rest of us, as she usually does. Eager to run around Papa and Ama’s living room, we let her down from her seat so we could eat in peace while keeping an eye on her.

Eventually she disappeared into the laundry room and returned holding the gray and white kitten my mother was fostering. Isobel had never held a kitten before although she had dearly wanted to since she first laid eyes on one. This is the first kitten she’s ever picked up and held all by herself.

I would have thought she was too young to pick up and hold a kitten by herself but she did a great job, surprising the whole family.  Now she thinks she’s ready to hold any animal she comes across, including the goats at the fair.

One step at a time, kid.

Follow Friday – My Pixie

22 Jul

Isobel has gone thorough many nicknames in her life (many of them invoking images of baked goods), but recently I’ve most often referred to her as “Pixie.” My recent favorite iPhone photos adorn today’s post.

I suppose I should come clean about my Big Secret. You are so going to roll your eyes and smack your head and think uncharitable things about me when you find out what all the fuss was about. I tried to prepare you, I mean, look at that hashtag! I have been solo parenting all week while my husband was away on business. Ta… da? Anyway, I wanted to vent about the difficulties of doing this by myself and mope that I missed him, but the last time he went away on business I not only called a complete stranger to wish them Happy Birthday at 6:30 in the morning, I also received several very worried emails and DMs about posting this kind of thing on the internet. Point taken, friends! I’m sharing this with you now because by the time you’re reading this he will be home and we will be engaging in massive amounts of PDA.

What is Follow Friday? It’s a Twitter meme that I have taken a couple steps further.  Learn more about it in my FAQ. See my nomination for a Shorty Award for Follow Friday here. You can read more Follow Friday goodness here.

badbanana People of Earth, an announcement. I just purchased a humongous megaphone.

MightyQuinn72 My phone says it’s “97” which must be it’s age in phone years cause I got it a year ago it’s already acting like a senile old man.

Sondeera If someone hasn’t coined the term “horrorscope” and started a gothic-bent horoscope site, America is officially pointless.

slackmistress For all of you not living in the moment, please take a second out of your day to tell me what time travel is like.

shariv67 When you’re a teen, you’re all, “You don’t own me!” Then you grow up, and the bank is all, “Oh yes, we do.”

KeepingYouAwake When typing “threesome?” into a chat window, regardless of context, exercise caution to be sure it’s the right window

bebehblog I have been trying to practice my conversation skills, but it turns out “So what is your blog about?” doesn’t work on normal people.

MeganBoley I didn’t think it was possible to make pulled pork seem unappetizing to me. But Subway has somehow managed to do it.

WiGovPR I once felt bad that I had no shoes until I met a man who had a Republican governor.

steenyweeny rip steenyweeny. died trapped on her floor and was eaten by a cat who could update tweetdeck to tell you all.

sarcasmically Love is not eating the last canoli. Then again, intelligence is not leaving the last canoli unattended, SUCKA.

DRUNKHULK ARE YOU HAPPY TEA PARTY!? THEY CLOSE BORDERS!

LPCookbook I sure could use some icebox cake. For dinner.

TheRedQueen @exlibris honey badger is your new porn name BTW.

Gen_with_a_G Humidity is so high, every time we go out the 2 year old asks confusedly “Is it raining?” And then my hair frizzes out like a clown wig.

louisvirtel My friend tells me that Khloe is “the coolest Kardashian sister.” That’s like being the funniest Menendez brother.

macleanbrendan When Twitter is down I go to the nearest cave and yell banal observations just to hear the echo: It’s Mother Nature’s retweet.

swedishpancake my house is no longer balls hot. now it’s just balls kinda warm.

shiraselko Rupert Murdoch will probably just go back to his former job – the old, bad guy at the end of Scooby-Doo episodes.

CcSteff My baby is the cutest, whiniest Roomba ever.

LouisPeitzman The new Rebecca Black single displays the same lack of self-awareness with none of the catchy riffs. We, we, we not excited. We not excited.

msbellows “Dead Whistleblowers” would be a good name for a band.

MightyQuinn72 I’m going to go kick my immune system in the balls now.
I mean workout in the hotel gym.

theleanover Radiation Is The River Of The World #ATomicWaits

InfiniteChickenAll Stripped Down For Decontamination #ATomicWaits

theleanover I Don’t Want To Grow Flippers #ATomicWaits

InfiniteChicken Acid Rain Dogs #ATomicWaits

modinkpeeb “Come On Up to The House (We Have Lead Curtains)” #ATomicWaits

EvenMoreSarah I haven’t had a Diet Coke today. As a reward please buy me a Diet Coke.

tristina_wright No, YOU got into the pear cider for lunch.

KeepingYouAwake It’s 10:30 and still nearly 90F on the thermometer in the kitchen, with striking humidity. I’m in hell, but how’d I die?

clasticdetritus If I were Obama I’d propose adding Reagan to Mt. Rushmore just to see the mangled argument Republicans come up with to oppose it.

MrWordsWorth When I am on hold on the phone, I see how much of Stairway to Heaven I can sing before I am finally put through.

theneener The last piece of leftover pizza I ate today made me feel weird inside.

sucittaM Dad always said “Time to hit the sack!” before bed. Not sure how getting punched in the testicles helped him sleep, but that was just dad.

theleanover I AM SHOUTING BECAUSE OF THE HEAT WHAT IS WRONG THIS IS CANADA OUR WEATHER IS NOT SUPPOSED TO GIVE US SWEASTICLES

theleanover SO SWEATY IT’S LIKE GOD IS MOCKING THE ISRAELITES WITH MY ABUNDANCE OF MOISTURE WAIT WHY DOES MY PHONE KNOW HOW TO SPELL ISRAELITES

ProfessorSnack Sent an e-mail to a friend who still uses a Juno address. I made static and screeching noises with my mouth during the sending process.

hellnope Gettin’ two birds stoned at once.

antigone_spit Pardon me, I have to go eat a burrito. #UsingTwitterToItsFullPotential

giraffrocentric Don’t post shirtless photos of your new boyfriend if you don’t want me to comment about his great tits and then Like my own comment.

Caissie Oh, you’re hung like a horse? That’s so cool! I have a gaping horse vagina! #WhatIWishISaid

Brain_Wash An NPR t-shirt at a farmer’s market is like a tramp stamp at a strip club.

loganfountain “hey there’s that weird lady” – neighbor-kid wearing only underwear sitting in a rain puddle

TwoAdults Husband commented on the size of my ice cream bowl. I gave him gestures a trucker would be proud of.

KeepingYouAwake Sometimes, when I’m at a loss for words, I just make explosion sounds.

killorn In Dying Alone news, I’m currently baking a birthday cake for a dog.

thejohnblog Ugh. My dog has so many fleas, his belly looks the ‘Marauder’s Map.’

markleggett My cat doesn’t like it when I “boop” her nose with my finger, but I’m not doing it for her benefit.

GeorgeTakei We can grow an artificial trachea with nanotechnology and stem cells, but we can’t make an escalator that isn’t broken half the time.

ApocalypseHow Wait, remind me again: Which one is Carmageddon, and which one is Jeep Impact?

TheNextMartha My kids are screaming at each other in the basement. I should close the door.

badbanana If you’re a British actor & you weren’t in at least 1 Harry Potter film, it’s time for a little self-evaluation.

littlest_liu Having a puppy or small children in your home may make you ask questions like, “Why is there a ketchup bottle in my underwear?”

BtotheD “Transformers 3” was a turd excreted by another turd, in a car with the windows rolled up in the middle of the summer.

FriedWords It would help if they taught English majors how to center the cheese on a McDonald’s cheeseburger.

ProfessorSnack I don’t multi-task all that well. I think being disappointing on 3 social media platforms is about my limit.

ecsuperhero Driving under the speed limit because I have precious cargo: three dozen cupcakes. Oh, and my kids.

TheBlackStar The Yo Gabba Gabba Share episode only reaffirms my theory that all of the trees are major pot heads.

TravonFree General MotorsHead #carmageddonbands

TravonFree Black Saabath #carmageddonbands

theleanover Public Transit Enemy #carmaggedonBands

pppapaya Iron and Winnebago #carmaggedonBands

theleanover Duran Durango #carmaggedonBands

theleanover They Might Be Jettas #carmaggedonBands

theleanover A Tribe Called Nissan Quest #carmaggedonBands

theleanover The Highwaymen #carmaggedonBands

theleanover The Black Kias #carmaggedonBands

theleanover Run GMC #carmaggedonBands

LaurenGberg Ford Non Blondes #carmaggedonBands

LaurenGberg Pavement #carmaggedonBands

theneener We’re watching a YouTube video about “Mexican Pointy Boots.” This is my Friday night.

slackmistress You’d think I’d be much thinner with the amount of food I drop in my cleavage.

thegrumbles there’s a sister act 2 bot. apparently.

emirkr I will be buried in a spring loaded casket filled with confetti, and a future archeologist will have one awesome day at work.

letsdiefriends Just successfully applied mascara with a 1-year old in my lap. #livingontheedge

ohrebecca Told Frankie that maybe I’d paint his nails for him. He gave me a baleful, but not entirely intolerant, look. Good dog.

jack_p Harry Potter is about doing what is right in the face of adversity. Twilight is about how important it is to have a boyfriend. -Stephen King

jenstatsky Just heard the bad news: J. Lo and Marc Anthony are both famous people.

keli_h @exlibris I do not care about number of followers I just want to make THE FAVORITES POST.

supDawgiHerd You will pay for your sins. If you have already paid, please disregard this message.

HarrisDanow Weird day. I discover @JudyBlume‘s on Twitter, and then ten minutes later FINALLY get my first period.

LLA_Princess Drunk. Eating kettle corn. Watching Harry Potter. Living the dream.

IamMsMoneypenny I still believe in chivalry, like the man paying for the flowers and the dinner, and then, like, paying for other stuff, too.

chickenscottpie The spontaneous cheers coming from sports tournament near my house makes me feel like I’m doing a really good job editing this story.

HipsterMermaid I’m going to write such an angry letter to Netflix about their prices – as soon as I finish everything in my queue.

mrfaulty Y’all realize that the internet runs on people stupid enough to click on banner ads?

NASeason I need an “It Gets Better” campaign for newbornhood.

Superfluously I’ll sleep when my phone’s dead.

What is Follow Friday? It’s a Twitter meme that I have taken a couple steps further.  Learn more about it in my FAQ. See my nomination for a Shorty Award for Follow Friday here. You can read more Follow Friday goodness here.

Easter Basket Inspiration

31 May

Here it is, nearly June, and I’m writing a post about Isobel’s Easter basket. I should probably feel ashamed of myself. But I won’t! Because I’m a shameless hussy. I’m hoping that someone will eventually come along and want ideas for a toddler’s Easter basket so I’m posting this in the hopes of finding that person. You sure are special, whomever you are. Plus, I like the photos too much not to post.

In a move that’s sure to spark controversy (which parentning decision isn’t?) I didn’t put any candy in Isobel’s Easter basket. She doesn’t need any and I knew she’d be going to an egg hunt later. Aslo one of her grandmas is a little liberal with the sugar so figured she’d be getting candy from multiple sources and I didn’t need to be one of them. I was right. So right in fact, that we’re going into June and she still has uneaten Easter candy in the cupboard.

For all I don’t agree with giving toddlers candy, it sure is cute to see her eat a piece of chocolate. Before she’s even finished chewing the last ibit she’s already asking for more, face smeared and sticky, lisping through the mouthful of sugar.

 I have a love-hate relationship with children’s gift giving. I love shopping and dreaming up fun things to give her. I hate the inevitable junkpile. Add to that the fact that last year we were so strapped for cash we couldn’t afford to give her toys in her first Easter basket (not even cheap ones) and Easter becomes another guilt-laden holiday associated with presents, hiding its deeper meaning: Cadbury eggs & marshmallow peeps. But I digress. This year we could buy her modest presents, so I did.

 I had a bit of a dilemma with this year’s gifts, as I always seem to do. As much as I abhor clutter I’m not so cruel as to think that my child should grow up without toys. On the whole my philosophy is to get her toys that last, that I don’t feel guilty spending my money on. Of course I’m not the only one buying her toys, but I prefer things that will last, things that will be played with often. I’m almost embarrassed to admit how I agonized over the shovel set. It’s plastic and crappy and obviously meant for a baby. Shouldn’t I get her a metal set that would last? In the end, my concern for her injuring herself or others won out, and I gave her an admittedly cheapie shovel and rake set. The good news is that she’s using the hell out of them, and at least once a day she asks to got outside so she can “dig for wormies.” She’d take them to bed if we let her, and she’s left the house for Grandma’s with those in her hands.

 She loves the butterfly kneeling pad, but she doesn’t understand its true purpose yet. When I sat on it to play with her outside she got pretty upset. It’s for your butt, little girl. Get used to it.

 (Easter is the perfect time of year to practice your power-lifting skills.)

 Plastic plates are truly essential at our house right now, as she’s too rough on dishes to be trusted with dangerously breakable porcelain. She loves this chickie plate and the matching blue gingham bunny plate. I didn’t get a photo of that one because as soon as she found her basket she ate wanted to eat breakfast off that plate. She’s still using them because in Isobel’s opinion, bunnies and chickies never go out of style, even when the seasons change.

She looks like a teenager here. I blame Easter.

Photos: Finger Puppets & Dancing

15 May